Stuart Miller-Osborne

Did she end up in a boiling pot At a popular Parisian brothel Or did she travel with the boy poet Away from the madness of his pen

Was the little known name Of a most famous lobster After her gentle master died Little is known of her fate She was seen occasionally But faded soon afterwards Into the alleys and backstreets Of her previous haunts

The mysterious cargo of the stricken Indian ship Was washed up on southern coasts for the next few years Its presence and its musical qualities were much valued I actually have a few examples in a glass jar on my desk The tar substitute is even with its shingle additions Is quite ordinary to the…

During the harsh winter of 1958 A number of ships were lost at sea Within the sight of the English coast One of these was the OPIHR Which was involved in a collision With the Swedish freighter Anne Thankfully the crew of the Indian ship Were all rescued and no lives were lost But the…

Something strange has happened to me As I have found the exact Wodehouse book That I had left on a train in Kandy here in Hanoi

I have just received an official notification That I will have to marry Sabrina Or the authorities will close my eight yard railway Sabrina thinks the ultimatum is unfair But is attracted by the Inland F grant Which will enable me to extend My eight yard railway to Finland

Of late I felt Very Lowe Who used to like my attention But although I am a Number 8 I feel that I am identifying As a Number 7 And on very bad days a Number 13 My GP had diagnosed depression And has prescribed a course Of brittle tar pills and local honey My…

Was one of the most decorated snipers From the last war With 888 confirmed kills At present I am reading her autobiography He No Longer Shares My Air This was a present from Sabrina What did surprise me was that The Bride on the Blue Train Once tried to commit suicide But her bullet missed…

My town has the shortest known railway In the world It is only eight yards long Which is about the size Of my back garden Sabrina and I often watch trains From the Bride on the Blue Train

Are a Post Punk band From Greater Manchester They are also known as The Two Ladies Their first album Red River Delta Was the fastest selling debut album in 1982 This was followed by Water Puppets in 1983 Which achieved an even greater success After a hiatus of eight years the sisters released Southward Expansion…