Joe 

You seem to have a great number of friends 

They are on my payroll Julie 

One of them was in trouble recently 

Really which one 

Martha

What was her crime 

She sent a photo of the CEO who was assassinated recently 

To her local councillor 

It was planning to close a WW2 footbridge over a nearby stream 

That is not a crime 

I would have been a lot more persuasive 

It seems that the chap who designed the bridge 

Had been accused of having fascist sympathies

A great number of people had fascist sympathies eighty years ago 

The maggot of a councillor who liked to see himself as left wing firebrand

Did not think it was a good thing to have in the town 

He tried to blame the flooded meadows 

But Martha saw through him 

She tried to be polite and use the democratic process 

But was was ignored  

So she thought that direct action was required 

Hence the death threat 

The cops have little else to do so she is in trouble 

That and wearing the Free Luigi tee shirt around town

Martha has always had style 

To make things worse this chap is also a faggot 

And has accused Martha of a hate crime 

What is a hate crime 

Not liking men in power 

Who think that anal intercourse is not a sin 

Do you think it is a sin 

Very much 

 And how it spreads unwanted diseases 

You have many friends Joe 

Some are lets say not university educated 

They can be a bit rough 

Would you have a word with them 

And ask them to visit the councillor 

To point out the error of his ways 

An offer that it cannot refuse 

I will send Rag and Bob Tail 

The faggot councillor will drop the whole thing 

I can promise ewe that 

Martha was just researching something for me 

I am writing a book about buttercups 

But ewe are a poet Joe 

Poets write books about buttercups 

The bridge will be saved 

Life will return to normal 

The cops will carry on copping 

You are a good man Joe 

I am a piece of shit 

But I do have a good side 

I will,also have a gentle chat with your sister 

It is not the first time Joe 

Nor will it be the last 

Martha is just Martha 

She is disgustingly intelligent 

But is still in my view 

A Child of the Fields