After a long flight I finally found the hotel

And then found my room and then my bed

But there was one rather large problem

There was a dead businessman between the sheets

He looked so at peace and his coffee was still warm

I took a sip as I was dry because of the hot weather

It was either from Iceland Brazil or South Wales

And I favoured its sharp yet rather decaying taste

My line of thought was then rudely interrupted

When a naked girl of tender years came out of the wall

She introduced herself as the senior chambermaid

Who was responsible for all the rooms on level twelve

And was showering after the businessman had paid for sex

It appeared that she was so good at this secondary occupation

That the poor man had hit an unseen rock

And had sunk quickly during his final voyage

She offered her services to me but I told her I was far too perverted

I asked the chambermaid when the event had occurred

As the businessman if left would soon fall foul of rigor mortis

And would be rather difficult if not impossible to move

It was then she asked me to help her throw the businessman

From the ornate balcony that overlooked the wide river below

I agreed as it was an instantly sackable offence

To ride fuck or face sit guests with heart conditions

The businessman only slightly disturbed the idyllic surface

Of the river as it peacefully travelled through the city

But nobody noticed or really cared as it was a common sight

To see dead businessmen being thrown from high hotels

It was as the chambermaid was slowly getting dressed

That I noticed a sequence of numbers on her bare bottom

I enquired if she was a student of mathematics at a university

Or just a trendy girl wearing fashionable death camp tattoo

But in truth it was just the telephone number

Of her recently married boyfriend