Even if you are the most miserable bastard in the world
You have got to be kind
Nothing else works
What is that Joe
It is something that Josie picked up for me
Where
At a summer fete in Mummy’s village
What is it
A mounted display detailing the development of golf balls
Over the last few centuries
Wooden c 1590
Feathery c 1790
Gutta Percha c 1850
Machine Gutty c 1880
Haskell c 1900
But you do not like golf
I would not say that
It is just that it is one of the rare sports
That I do not excel in
But you have said that you consider it is a game
For cunts with small dicks
My past always comes back to haunt me
I do have friends who play golf
You actually have friends
Yes
Do you pay them
No
Am I your friend
Of course as we are engaged
I have known you forever
Why do you think Josie purchased it
Because it was Mad Josie
Before she caught her train
You two were deep in an argument
About one of her silly friends
Who you had brought to tears
I have since apologised
You can be such a cunt Joe
Two and two never make five Sephine
I agree but you do shoot from the hip
It is all part of the package
Overall I am just too honest sometimes
Would you have spoken to me like that
No
Even if I had agreed with Mary Moon
It is unlikely that you would have agreed with her
But suppose I had agreed with her
Would you have brought me to tears
No
Why
Because you are incredibly beautiful Sephine
And
Mary Moon is not in the least beautiful
She is the size of a pyramid
Without beauty the world is nothing
That is so cruel Joe
Are we going to fight
I have no intention to fight with you
Just because I am a cool calm blonde
Does not mean that I could not slap you sometimes
Deep down I am as fiery as Josephine
Why did you call her Josephine
Because that is her name
We all call her Josie
You very rarely call her Josephine
I have noticed on the rare occasions
When she fucks you off
That you call her Josephine
Grow up Josephine
You are so like your brother Josephine
Have I fucked you off Sephine
No
Then why are you getting defensive
How heavy is that golf thing of yours Joe
It has a decent weight for its size
Enough to kill a man
Possibly
It would probably do more damage to a cat
Why do you ask
Because even beautiful blonde girls
Can fantasise when the planets are in alignment
Then I have about three days to live
Do not push your luck Joe
Just do not push your luck