Looking Gorgeous


Not so long ago

I was sitting on a riverside bench

Reading my new Bible

When I noticed a woman

Young in years

Struggling with her shoes

She eventually gave up

And jumped into the river

With the help of a passing gendarme

We rescued the woman from her fate

After returning to my apartment

To dry off and clean up

I returned to the bench

Where I had been reading my Bible

And to my surprise it was no longer there

Yet this was unimportant in view of the drama

A few days later I received a telephone call

Requesting that I visit the hospital

As the woman had requested the my audience

She had previously thanked the gendarme

As it appeared that the woman had tried to kill herself

I thought that possibly my visit might aid her recovery

She told me a story that I half expected to hear

Marie had been engaged to her childhood sweetheart

They were planning their future together

And then he met and eloped with an American heiress

Leaving Marie distraught and quite alone in Paris

For a number of months she had fought her black dogs

And decided to leave the city forever

She was going to jump from a high window

But was petrified of heights

So chose the swollen river instead

I asked her why she had been fighting

With her fashionable shoes when I noticed her

She had purchased them from a fashionable shop

But in her confused grief had chosen the wrong size

This confused me as most people contemplating suicide

Would not add to their wardrobe of shoes

She added that she wanted to look good for God

And make an impression in Heaven

Even though the river would her considerable beauty

Marie had worn her engagement dress under her coat

I had not noticed this fact in the excitement of the rescue

It was then that she pointed to a Bible on her bedside table

The cops had supposed that it was hers as they found it nearby

Nobody actually owns a Bible I have always known this fact

I told Marie that God had been looking after her on that dreadful day

The Bible was the obvious clue not her undersized shoes

Or the fact that the gendarme and I had been nearby

We exchanged our details and promised to support each other

TBC