Zora
Yes
I am told that you have an unusual hobby
I do have unusual hobby
What is that
I like shitting in public
I would object if I was your girlfriend
Public I said public not pubic
And I agree that would be pretty gross
Why do you like shitting in public
Let me make myself clear
I am rather shy
Then why do you shit in public
Because I like my turds to be seen by millions
Explain
Do you remember when the Queen died
Queen who
Elizabeth the Second
Is she dead
Yes
Seriously
Was it on the news
Yes after Match of the Day
What is got to do with you shitting
Everything and nothing
Confused . com
Think about it
Go on
Her funeral was shown all around the world
It was a golden opportunity to publicise my turds
I was very clever as about a year before she died
I found out the funeral route and decided to shit near Sidcup Services
Did it work
Yes
Although some fucking beggar put part of it into his sandwich
That was selfish of him
Her it was a her like me
Have you been away
Yes
Where
Southern France
Which part
London
London is not in Southern France
Do you like the South of France
Hate it
Why
Because I like trains and Modernist architecture
Was that not expensive
Very
How did you afford it
I let an architect fuck me dry
You sold your body then
No I did it for free
Even anal
Deep Seat Pizza
Even that
Where did you go
Somewhere hot
Did it have a name
Roquebrune-Cap-Martin
Never heard of it
It is near Westbury in Wiltshire
Why did you choose
Roquebrune-Cap-Martin
Because of E-1027
Is that a bus
No
A medicine
Not even warm
Then what
E-1027 is a modernist villa in Roquebrune-Cap-Martin, in the Alpes-Maritimes department of France. It was designed and built from 1926–1929 by the Irish architect and furniture designer Eileen Gray and the French/Romanian Architect Jean Badovici
Thank God for Wiki
Let us pray
What does it look like
A villa
Call me thick but what has this to do with shitting in public
Everything and nothing
Let me explain
The villa overlooks the sea
So
It is obvious
Really
Apart from modernist villa’s what else do you find near the sea
I do not have a clue
Railway lines
Losing me
There is a railway just behind the villa
Many trains pass by
Including
Le Train Bleu
Why do they call it Le Train Bleu
Because of the sea
I think I know what you are going to say
Pray tell
That there is a path in view of the railway which is passed by many trains
How did you know that
It is logical Zora
If you shit on the footpath then it will be seen by many trains
And will be retained in the minds of the passengers
Am I right
More or less
Yes it will be a much travelled turd
But that is so yesterday
At a risk of repeating myself
Le Corbusier
Is that a cafe
No he was a world famous architect designer painter urban planner writer and one of the pioneers of modern architecture
So he did not own a cafe
No
When you say modern architecture do you mean those awful tower blocks where the lifts do not work and you are mugged when you go to the supermarket
Forget the supermarkets
Why
Because they closed down as soon as they opened
But yes Le Corbusier designed these buildings
The saved space and people on low incomes had somewhere to get high
I like that joke
What joke
Get high
Confused.com
Let is stop here
You shit on the route of the Queen’s funeral bash
Then some cunt ate your shit
Yes
You shit next to a railway line so the people travelling on the Blue Train
Could see your turds and remember them
How many people saw your turds
None
Why were the French on strike again
No
Then why
Was it eaten by another homeless person
No
Are you saying that the South of France is only for rich people
No I was saying that the Blue Train no longer runs
Have they changed the colour
No
It is far as I know just regional TGVs and the like
What project are you working on at present
Le Corbusier
I thought you would say that
I said Le Corbusier
Are you by any chance shitting in the rare lifts
That actually function in these massive high rises
Yes
Is this so that the poor cunts
Who skate through all the vomit and piss
Can come and count your turds
Right in one
How do you calculate the distance that your turds has travelled
What do lifts do
Go up and down and occasionally break down
It is basic mathematics
The lifts travel and the lost souls travel
What is the name of your hobby
Fuck knows but it keeps me regular
Silly Boy’s Silly Sister