I like to think that I am apolitical

As I have fucked women

From all the major parties


Jill from the Lib Dems

Asked if I might eat her slowly

From the garden upwards


Moira from the Conservatives

Was obsessed with watching me piss

Into all her important holes


I will not discuss what Issy from the Greens

Asked me to do with Snowdrop Beauty

After it took first prize at Crufts


Socialist Ceira fell in love with me

As she thought I was a considerate lover

Unlike her anal fixated comrades


Ceira was not conventionally beautiful

As her huge eyes hinted at disease


She was apple pear shaped

With tiny boobs and a large arse


But there was something

Of a wounded animal about her


Which persuaded me run

As an Independent candidate

At the forthcoming local elections