I have a skin condition like Marat

Which means that I have to bathe every day

You have two tasks both of which are important

Firstly you must ensure that I do not dry drown

Or suffer a terrible fall when my body is wet

Secondly you will be required to cover me with this special cream

I will later rest on a marble slab for a period of one hour

Whether you carry out these duties with or without clothes

Is totally up to you although I would prefer the latter

For as long as you help me you shall use the lodge

Meals are provided without cost should you require them

You agreed salary will be paid into your bank once a month

Due to my allergies I would rather that you do not keep pets

Caged birds or colourful fish in illuminated tanks are acceptable

I will always call you by your first name or a chosen alternative