Piers

Yes Mummy

I have asked your sister to leave our home

Why

Because she has brought shame on the Roberts family

Is she shagging Damien again

How did you know that Piers

Because she lets me watch

WHAT

Only joking mummy

I just edit her OF site

I do believe that I am going to faint

Sorry mummy

It is not you who should be sorry

You are a good boy

Mummy is so proud of you

Unlike your tart of a sister

I am happy that you are proud of me mummy

Do you know what today is

Tuesday

No

Wednesday

You are getting warmer

Thursday

Today is World Book Day

You are allowed to dress up as your favourite character

And better still you can attend school as that character

What are you going to wear Piers

It is on my bed next to my bears mummy

PIERS ! WHAT IS THIS

It is Grandpa’s war uniform

He lets me wear it sometimes to birthday parties

I have never seen you wearing it

That is because you are too pissed mummy

What did you say Piers

That is because I get changed elsewhere

Do you know what this uniform is

Yes Mummy

It is the uniform of the Waffen-SS

Grandpa fought with the good soldiers

Is that what he told you mummy

What about his accent

We are from Newcastle

That accounts for his accent

Grandpa’s accent is German mummy

Why would he lie to me his only daughter

I am going to have words with him

What about his heart mummy

Of fuck his heart Piers

Please call me Silly Boy mummy

Piers please show mummy what book you have chosen

For World Book Day

Here it is mummy

I do not read German

Neither do I

But Grandpa says that it roughly translates as

My Struggle

Mummy mummy shall I get you a glass of water



Silly Boy aged 29 3/4