I live in a lock keepers cottage

With Janice and our two dogs

It is obviously situated near

The Kennet and Avon Canal

Ours is an idyllic situation

Which was horribly spoilt

By a drunken couple

Whilst I was walking Pippa

Just before her bedtime last week

It was not something

That I wanted my little dog to see

I tried to report it to the authorities

But they showed a distinct lack of interest

So I decided as a warning to others

To change the nearest direction sign

Away from its correct name

It now rather sadly reads

The Kennet and Avon Anal

Which was treated locally as vandalism

But I think I was well within my rights

To post this as a warning to others

Walking their nocturnal dogs