Was the first movie that I ever made

It bombed at the box office

Only just covering it production costs

I shot it in three days in my apartment

Wearing only a bear costume

My real life

Sister

Eileen

Played the part

Of Eileen

Who steals a lizard

From a zoo

And pretends

It is a bear

She travels to Berlin

To make a movie

Knowing that

She is being pursued

By the cops

The movie

Ends in a shoot out

And each character dies

Including

The Chief of Police

Who was played

By our taxi driver

Whose name is Phil

He was born

In Basingstoke

And went to

The same school

As Eileen and myself