We have just found a dog With the ability to time travel It is named Mayan Emergency I have yet to identify the breed As it is has not been previously recorded

I occasionally direct movies Some are successful and some bomb At present I am directing an action movie Which I know will be successful The hero has along with three others Have disguised themselves as clowns And have infiltrated a circus to kill the bad guys They have attached silencers to their weapons So that […]

I recently invited a malignant politician To my lighthouse red and white My intention was to assassinate him By pushing him from the highest point But I did not go through with my plan As this dreadful man brought cakes with him Which we enjoyed over my questionable tea Although our views differed greatly He […]

In his recently discovered secret diaries, Wittgenstein reports that, while masturbating at the Front during World War I, he was thinking about mathematical problems Six why is it a perfect number In number theory, a perfect number is a positive integer that is equal to the sum of its positive divisors, excluding the number itself. […]

Joe what is you favourite childhood memory I have many but one really sticks out As you know I am a country lad and grew up loving all creatures Even pikeys Yes even pikeys But I really just had one favourite Was it the foxes No Sabre Tooth Tigers You only find them in cities […]

It is false history month in a few days I really enjoy false history month Pray tell me what it is Joe It is a time every year when in schools Our children You do not have children Joe The children of others Pete The children of others are brain washed into believing Totally false […]

I showered within the hour Yet my skin is already dry It reflects the white sun Which paints me slowly During the languid hours

A warm wind caresses my hidden balcony I am wearing just a damp towel Later I will sit on the beach Shy of my tan marks Souvenirs of travel

Is not much discussed As it is of no interest Count the trees It is a much more rewarding occupation

I saw you from the far platform  But could not see your eyes  I imagined them to be raven  Like your hair  This is not a letter of attraction  But a request to borrow your newspaper  As I left mine on the train