I only have five fingers But I like to impress So I lie Whenever I am in cities I wear oversized gloves To mask my dishonesty I am also a thief As I steal tablecloths From churches Sheets from hotels And nightshirts from friends I frequently cut them up For use as canvases

An invisible spider Ran across the carpet And hid behind my Banksy

Earlier today I purchased a Chagall poster As I was walking towards the Seine My Lilith passed me on a red bicycle She offered to take the poster To our apartment nearby As I was late back from lunch I later found out that she had sold the poster So that she could buy herself […]

Paris through ttttttttttthe Window Is the only poster I own I own nothing else Apart from a cat That studies The sky People including My sister Are floating Through the city A Metro Train Is travelling on its roof It is reflected In my multi-coloured window

Not much is known about Charles He was recorded as living in Paris Between the wars Although these wars Were never identified Charles was a blind mute Who communicated Through poetry Much of which is now lost Only six poems survive

Whenever I visit Paris I expect to see Naked women In my feverish Dreams I am a poet Mute and blind Gutter hidden Burning with hate In this tropical city Charles des Ombres

I always ensure that my priests wear blindfolds Before I begin my household duties They smoke As I tell them about movies I have seen A housemaid who turned into a sparrow So that she might watch painful affairs All they wanted was happiness Was the title of the movie I wept yesterday when I […]

I have visited distant countries Where tidal waves are much revered Although gentle I am very dismissive Of these thin superstitions As I totally trust the golden seas

Where are you going To see Derek’s cottage my petal What for Because I admire the artist Artist Yes Out here Yes There is nothing fucking here There is a lot here What do you think Tommy It fucking stinks There is nothing here That is the essence of Dungeness It is the essence of […]

I am a good man or at least I think I am I care for the community and am a kind person So when I saw a large shipping container Parked badly at the side of the Gladstone Road I contacted the police as the road was quite badly lit And the container would present […]