I am often accompanied By The Man from Chile And my German Host As we walk in the summer sea Our Visions of Atlantis Watches us from my coastal home She glides like a liquid porcelain From Room to Room Dressed as a Southern Belle

A few weeks ago it was reported That a woman of mature years Had rested on one of our coastal benches And had quietly passed away This saddened me greatly until I realised That she had died whilst looking at the sea I was almost jealous of her gentle passing As I intend to die…

Whenever you are alone Remind yourself That God has sent everyone else away So that there is only you and him God Yes Joe here Really I thought it was the Avon Lady What is troubling you Joe Have you seen a fat woman on the beach again No not as bad as that Then…

You have seen my descent It was an ugly journey All of my own making But now watch me rise

Rambo Yes Why do we call ourselves The Secret Seven When there is only five members of our gang Harry Gopher Sidney Richard Gonk and You and Eye That is because we have two secret agents with us Who are they I do not know as I have never met them That’s stupid Shut up…

Chat Cat Hat A cat wearing a hat This has been noted before I do adore Feline Mathematics

I recently moved into a house Which was perfect in all aspects Except one that being its garden was overrun by mice I tried various solutions but none worked Until I gave a home to a rescue cat named SSI I had no clue why it had been given this name But the cat answered…

What time is the steam train due  Harry looked at Toad  Dunno  But you must know as you wear glasses  Ten past one  How do you know that Gopher  It is written in the stars  What are you doing Sidney Richard Gonk  Looking at the daisies There are so many today  It has snowed you moron …

I am currently writing a poem About the Famous Five I plan to publish it in the future Which means that you Will never read my poem

I have a studio near the canal bridge I am a self taught photographer Who specialises in photographs of the future I have yet to open my studio