We are standing in front of a painting by Tracey Emin You have taken an instant dislike to this work The painting is both complicated and simple At the same time Which is why I like it My Body Slipped Tracey show us your Cunt  The second line is repeated a number of times There […]

I lost an eye in a horse riding accident Which was very careless of me I now have a glass eye Which I love very much As we share wonderful times When we visit the grave of my lost eye My glass eye weeps with a genuine grief This touches me greatly And I feel […]

I own a Blue painting Rather it is a Midnight Blue My Cunt is Wet With Fear Is a work by Tracy Emin Exorcism of the Last Painting I Ever Made Is another of her works I do not own either of these If fact I do not own anything of hers As I am […]

I am naked you are naked Read this naked I am not interested In your naked body But your naked soul I wish to see your soul As naked as my garden Summer colours on display I have nothing more to add This poem is now complete  

I woke up one morning and decided to start a war A beach was chosen and it was up to me To give the signal to start the war But I hesitated and the soldiers lost interest And then fucked off to fight in another war   They laid me out on a crap table  […]

I am in a small supermarket with my wife She send me off to find people I do not know A few minutes later I find myself next to shelves Stocked with Adidas training shoes Which are all priced at five pound ninety five As I normally pay twenty pounds I am much impressed I […]

Siberia Bay was semi-circular and full of disembodied echos Whose origins were as mysterious as their sea music    This is Bay Radio and we will be with you As we approach the midnight hour   Whether you are tucked up in bed Or sitting on the beach listening to Bay Music   Let us […]

When my wife and I visited Prague We found a stray dog Which we soon adopted But we did not know its name So we named the dog Scottish Goalkeepers How We Love Them  Or Marshall for short     14/06/2021

When I was at school I was taught how to plot graphs And gain an understanding of their mysterious values My graph was determined by information received from my classmates Who is your favourite fictional secret agent Napoleon Solo and Illya Kuryakin gained the most votes Followed by James Bond Life was easy The good […]

I am in jail now Serving eight years For slicing those Filthy cunts But why are they Punishing me As I cleansed The streets Girls like me Are now safe From those men In some ways I feel like Christ Who did no harm And only good But was punished By the stupidity Of the […]