as recorded by his younger brother <\/i><\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
He was born in West Ham and lived in a high rise near the football ground<\/p>\n
His family originally came from Norfolk but moved to London in the nineteenth century for economic reasons as his father was a skilled fisherman<\/p>\n
Gregory Si was of average height and celebrated a dark complexion although his eyes were blue<\/p>\n
He lived near the football ground and supported West Ham<\/p>\n
He published his first poem Time Without Beauty<\/i> when he was twelve<\/p>\n
It won first prize at the Poplar Pie Festival that year<\/p>\n
The prize was a drain cover which he kept in his bedroom<\/p>\n
It was cast by Dickinson & Son in 1888<\/p>\n
Aged thirteen he changed into a drain cover for six months as he thought his prize to be lonely<\/p>\n
On his return he wrote another thirty-five poems<\/p>\n
None of these have survived<\/p>\n
His prize has survived and can be found in Canning Town near the site of the bus station<\/p>\n
He was the youngest child of four<\/p>\n
His sisters were called Babs, Lucy and Maureen<\/p>\n
The whole family spoke with a slight Norfolk accent<\/p>\n
As a young boy, Gregory decided never to visit Dagenham which was a problem as his first job was as an apprentice to a watchmaker in Dagenham<\/p>\n
In view of this he decided never to visit Southend<\/p>\n
Which again was a problem as his family holidayed there once a year<\/p>\n
At the age of fifteen he decided to visit all the major towns in Essex, but to never to visit Berwick on Tweed which was a pity as he loved railway bridges<\/p>\n
He often drew railway bridges and with his first wage purchased one just north of Romford<\/p>\n
At the age of sixteen he turned into a milk crate, but nobody really noticed except the local dogs a fact he came to regret<\/p>\n
He often made wax candles for the local church which was called Our Lady of Fatima<\/i><\/p>\n
At the age of seventeen he caught fire and received burns to the face and arms and changed into a church candle for a period of two months<\/p>\n
He was locked in a cupboard to avoid further accidents<\/p>\n
On his return he stood as a candidate for the Green Party during the General Election. He polled one vote and was elected to Parliament<\/p>\n
He held the seat for ten days before tendering his resignation due to the onset of achromatopsia<\/p>\n
At the age of twenty-one he changed into his sister Maureen and married her childhood sweetheart Robert and had three children Lloyd,Lloyd and Lloyd<\/p>\n
During these years he wrote an unpublished bestseller called<\/p>\n
Newtown Savage <\/b><\/p>\n
Newtown Savage was travelling back to America from Portugal where he had concluded a very successful business venture. <\/i><\/p>\n
Not many things scared Newtown Savage but flying did. Whenever he travelled to Europe he always travelled by ship. <\/i><\/p>\n
He had become fond of travelling by ship. <\/i><\/p>\n
Newton Savage at the age of thirty was a very wealthy man. He considered he had the Midas touch. All that he touched turned to gold. <\/i><\/p>\n
But he was not happy and these sea voyages confirmed his unhappiness. He paced the decks like a madman looking for a sign. He did not know what this sign would be. He believed in his own Gods but they left him alone. <\/i><\/p>\n
About half way through the voyage Newton Savage was seated on one of the upper decks near the lifeboats reading a Mid-Atlantic newspaper. He had finished his coffee and was about to eat his last piece of toast when a seagull swooped down and snatched it from his grasp cutting the web of his hand with its beak <\/i><\/p>\n
The seagull as it flew away but became confused by the geography of the deck and collided with the bow of the nearby lifeboat. It fell stunned to the deck. <\/i><\/p>\n
Without consideration Newton Savage removed his shoe and beat the seabird to death throwing the bloodied corpse into the ocean.<\/i><\/p>\n
The novel itself ran to nearly one million words but he destroyed all but the opening paragraphs as he disagreed with Ayn Rand<\/p>\n
Tiring of fame he turned into the left kneecap of the West Ham centre forward Thomas Paine and enjoyed two fine seasons for West Ham and England before being shattered into pieces by a late tackle from a Sunderland defender<\/p>\n
It was after this that his mental problems began. He married the injured player\u2019s clavicle in a quiet ceremony at Shoreditch Town Hall<\/p>\n
The marriage lasted less than a year and he returned divorced and penniless to his brothers flat where he rested as a third floor walkway for nearly two years<\/p>\n
It was during this time that he made the association of a small yellow flower which was growing in a damp patch on the far stairwell<\/p>\n
Their conversations on a variety of philosophical subjects were the talk of the neighborhood and they often lectured together on religious subjects<\/p>\n
The partnership came to an abrupt end when the yellow flower was picked by a child returning from the West Ham verses Cagliari Champions League match as a present for his mother and to celebrate a 2-0 win<\/p>\n
Because of this Gregory Si returned to his roots and served as a waiter at a nearby bistro called Salamanders Three<\/i><\/p>\n
It was during this time that he decided to trace his family tree and booked a hotel in Thetford in Norfolk<\/p>\n
As he awaited his train a shabby drug user who called herself Grace of the Gutter<\/i> gave him his first sexual experience<\/p>\n
She expected ten pounds but instead he turned into a hypodermic needle full of heroin which she injected in the privacy of her flat on the Pentonville Road<\/p>\n
Five days later she was found dead in a soiled vest on the floor of her bathroom<\/p>\n
She expected ten pounds but instead he turned into a hypodermic needle full of heroin which she injected in the privacy of their room in a Thetford hotel<\/p>\n
Five days later she died and Gregory buried her in a clearing near the main road through the town<\/p>\n
Although the romance was short it had a profound effect on Gregory\u2019s life and he changed into two bottles of biological hand cleanser seeing service at both Thetford and Kings Cross railway stations<\/p>\n
He was getting increasingly scared of his changes and decided to run a fruit stall selling only oranges which he did without a break for the next forty years<\/p>\n
He did not marry for fear of passing his strange life on<\/p>\n
At the age of seventy-one he set his fruit stall on fire and travelled to Romford to pray for forgiveness at a church which was not called Our Lady of Fatima<\/i><\/p>\n
It was while he was praying that he felt increasingly dizzy and thinking he was about to die retired to the confessional<\/p>\n
Within minutes he felt himself floating above the pews near the altar to the excitement and amazement of the worshippers that day<\/p>\n
Soon there were thousands staring at him and saying prayers. Some were crying and bringing the sick for him to touch<\/p>\n
Romford soon became the Lourdes of England and the town grew much in size.<\/p>\n
Gregory was not always in view as he wanted to sustain this latest change<\/p>\n
He hid in the confessional and watched the pilgrims wait for him<\/p>\n
The miracles came easily and he displayed a great pleasure in exercising them<\/p>\n
On his free days he lived quietly in his house in Harold Wood where he took advice from God on how to do his best<\/p>\n
Gregory Si died at the age of ninety-nine in a road traffic accident near the Church of the Divine <\/i><\/p>\n
On that day West Ham United beat Real Madrid 3-0\u00a0 in the Champions League Final at Wembley<\/p>\n
So pleased was God that he granted Gregory Si further life<\/p>\n
To be reborn in West Ham within sight of the football ground<\/p>\n
To have three sisters<\/p>\n
And parents who originated from Norfolk fishing stock<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
\n<\/i><\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
\u00a0<\/i><\/p>\n
\u00a0<\/i><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
as recorded by his younger brother He was born in West Ham and lived in a high rise near the football ground His family originally came from Norfolk but moved to London in the nineteenth century for economic reasons as his father was a skilled fisherman Gregory Si was of average height and celebrated […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1019"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1019"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1019\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1019"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1019"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1019"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}