I have an Indian friend who is careless in his habits as he crosses railway lines with express trains approaching at speed<\/p>\n
I have a knowledge of high speed trains after being hit by one when I was twenty-eight<\/p>\n
I was strangely uninjured even though I took the full force of the train<\/p>\n
By the laws of physics I should have exploded with my body parts spread far and wide<\/p>\n
The only injury that I received was a bruised elbow and a headache which lasted for six months<\/p>\n
It was suggested that I was the Christ Child and in connection with this assumption I was asked to re-write the Bible in a postmodern and hyper realist style<\/p>\n
To achieve this I added a great number of footnotes some quite graphic<\/p>\n
There were four hundred and ninety six footnotes per page<\/p>\n
On the day of its publication I sent a copy of my Bible to my Indian friend as well as a hi-viz jacket so that he might cross busy railway lines in a degree of safety<\/p>\n
I was also given an open-air theatre by the publishers as well as a wife and a tweed jacket<\/p>\n
Sadly the reviews were mixed and quite hostile which did not bother me but caused my Indian friend’s friend to end his life in a rural storm drain<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I have an Indian friend who is careless in his habits as he crosses railway lines with express trains approaching at speed I have a knowledge of high speed trains after being hit by one when I was twenty-eight I was strangely uninjured even though I took the full force of the train By the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-10468","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10468","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=10468"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10468\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":10472,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10468\/revisions\/10472"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=10468"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=10468"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=10468"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}