{"id":1188,"date":"2014-08-20T16:56:52","date_gmt":"2014-08-20T16:56:52","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.stuartmillerosborne.co.uk\/?p=1188"},"modified":"2014-08-22T20:57:34","modified_gmt":"2014-08-22T20:57:34","slug":"erotike-goethe-and-chichichi-explore-the-universe","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/2014\/08\/20\/erotike-goethe-and-chichichi-explore-the-universe\/","title":{"rendered":"Erotike Goethe and ChiChiChi Explore the Universe"},"content":{"rendered":"

Chopin<\/strong><\/p>\n

ChiChiChi and I were sitting at a piano<\/p>\n

We were both playing Chopin quite violently<\/p>\n

I was playing a Nocturne and she a Funeral March<\/p>\n

We each had our own appreciative audience<\/p>\n

As we touched the cold keys I realised that it was my turn to be the albino so I retired to the gloriette and howled for an hour<\/p>\n

That was the last time I saw her for eight years although we wrote to each other frequently<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Prison Diary <\/b><\/p>\n

Today was very much like yesterday, I spent most of my day with Jonny in our cell playing cards. <\/i><\/p>\n

I won his paparazzi photographs of Jackie O which I displayed proudly in the prison chapel so that inmates could masturbate quietly during Mass<\/i><\/p>\n

Jonny is obsessed with Jackie O and our cell is covered in photographs of her. My favourite is the Dallas series of photographs with JFK <\/i><\/p>\n

He uses all his other photographs as chips whilst gambling but the assassination photographs are sacred. He once glassed another inmate who tried to steal them<\/i><\/p>\n

When he is not talking about Jackie O, he sleeps<\/i><\/p>\n

Jonny has threatened to kill himself on many occasions but I dissuade him by saying that he should kill someone else<\/i><\/p>\n

For the present he agrees <\/i><\/p>\n

He keeps a rifle under his bed <\/i><\/p>\n

I keep only letters from you under my bed. I number them in reverse <\/i><\/p>\n

Your photograph is on the wall next to my bed <\/i><\/p>\n

I admire your pubic hair<\/em><\/p>\n

When I will write to you I will use no words<\/i><\/p>\n

Words are redundant<\/i><\/p>\n

I will only send the most beautiful blue paper in the world to you<\/i><\/p>\n

You deserve the best<\/em><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The Most Beautiful Blue Paper in the World <\/i><\/b><\/p>\n

I received your letter this morning and immediately retired to the orangerie to read it<\/i><\/p>\n

But all I found was the most beautiful blue paper in the world which I placed on my cunt until it was damp<\/i><\/p>\n

I will return my smell to you; keep it close to your heart<\/i><\/p>\n

Why do you not reward me with your words <\/i><\/p>\n

I would like to share your confinement <\/i><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/i><\/p>\n

Dreaming of your Odours \u00a0<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n

On the whole life is tolerable here<\/i><\/p>\n

I sleep well as your odours linger in the air when I close my eyes<\/i><\/p>\n

I never dream of you <\/i><\/p>\n

Only of your odours<\/i><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/i><\/p>\n

Jonny meets Laura <\/i><\/b><\/p>\n

I have made friends with the Prison Chaplain and he has handed me the keys to the library which I visit after hours<\/i><\/p>\n

There is not much of a selection, just the usual detective stories and romantic fiction plus of course a few bibles<\/i><\/p>\n

Which are never read in company<\/i><\/p>\n

On the shelf nearest the door I found a thick maroon book on Romanticism which is an odd find in a prison<\/i><\/p>\n

I have read it every day for the past six years and still am only halfway through <\/i><\/p>\n

About four months ago I met Laura and invited her back to the cell <\/i><\/p>\n

Each night she would sit on the chair between Jonny and myself and we would discuss poetry until the dawn broke<\/i><\/p>\n

Only then would she steal back to the library<\/i><\/p>\n

I feel that Jonny has a passion for her as above his bed next to the pictures of Jackie O is Schiller\u2019s poem <\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Poem<\/strong><\/p>\n

From earth I seem to wing my flight,<\/p>\n

And sun myself in Heaven’s pure light,<\/p>\n

When thy sweet gaze meets mine<\/p>\n

I dream I quaff ethereal dew,<\/p>\n

When mine own form I mirror’d view<\/p>\n

In those blue eyes divine!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Blest notes from Paradise afar,<\/p>\n

Or strains from some benignant star<\/p>\n

Enchant my ravish’d ear;<\/p>\n

My Muse feels then the shepherd’s hour<\/p>\n

When silv’ry tones of magic power<\/p>\n

Escape those lips so dear!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Young Loves around thee fan their wings —<\/p>\n

Behind, the madden’d fir-tree springs,<\/p>\n

As when by Orpheus<\/a> <\/strong>fir’d;<\/p>\n

The poles whirl round with swifter motion,<\/p>\n

When in the dance, like waves o’er Ocean,<\/p>\n

Thy footsteps float untir’d!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Thy look, if it but beam with love,<\/p>\n

Could make the lifeless marble move,<\/p>\n

And hearts in rocks enshrine;<\/p>\n

My visions to reality<\/p>\n

Will turn, if, Laura, in thine eye<\/p>\n

I read — that thou art mine!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Laura<\/strong><\/p>\n

Laura supplies me with drugs which I give to Jonny in small doses<\/i><\/p>\n

Just to keep him calm and balanced<\/i><\/p>\n

This seems to work as Jonny spends the day in an almost dreamlike state and at weekends donates his assassination photographs to the chapel <\/i><\/p>\n

Laura does not leave the cell now and spends her nights with Jonny <\/i><\/p>\n

They are lovers <\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Mildew<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n

Word has reached me that you will be released in forty-eight days. I will not meet you but will hand a copy of my latest newspaper article to a vagrant to give to you<\/i><\/p>\n

It is about a subject that favours your heart<\/i><\/p>\n

Think of me when you read it and write of the fungus <\/i><\/p>\n

On the most beautiful blue paper in the world <\/i><\/p>\n

I will keep your letter warm until you return<\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Serial Killers<\/strong><\/p>\n

Jonny has given up drugs and Jackie O, his photographs of her both clothed and nude are spread about the prison <\/i><\/p>\n

I hear that even the governor has one framed in his office<\/i><\/p>\n

Each morning I wake them with a cup of tea and discuss what we will do when we are released<\/i><\/p>\n

Jonny has nineteen more years to serve <\/i><\/p>\n

I will be released soon <\/i><\/p>\n

One day I will discover what my crime was and why I have served so many years<\/i><\/p>\n

That will be a day full of interest <\/i><\/p>\n

Jonny was imprisoned for the murder of a number of albino serial killers<\/i><\/p>\n

An unusual crime <\/i><\/p>\n

After the murder of the first albino serial killer he decided to murder all other albino serial killers <\/i><\/p>\n

An admirable occupation <\/i><\/p>\n

He does not know my secret as I am Hispanic in appearance <\/i><\/p>\n

Only you and I know that I can change colour at will <\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Escape<\/strong>
\n<\/i><\/p>\n

Jonny escaped this morning after killing three prison guards <\/i><\/p>\n

He was aided by Laura <\/i><\/p>\n

Who shot the second guard in the balls <\/i><\/p>\n

As they crossed the final landing <\/i><\/p>\n

They will never be caught <\/i><\/p>\n

I wish them well <\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Release<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n

Because I helped to bury the murdered guards in the prison yard my sentence has been reduced <\/i><\/p>\n

The quick lime burnt my hands <\/i><\/p>\n

And that accounts for my release <\/i><\/p>\n

Prisoners who burn their hands are often released without question <\/i><\/p>\n

I will be released tomorrow <\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Breakfast in the Stars <\/i><\/b><\/p>\n

ChiChiChi was true to her word as soon as I had passed through the prison gates a vagrant in a double breasted suit handed me her newspaper article. I gave him one of her letters which he sniffed and placed in his pocket with a smile <\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Gardeners Warned about Mildew Menace<\/b><\/p>\n

By ChiChiChi
\nEnvironment Editor<\/p>\n

Gardeners and allotment owners are being warned to be extra vigilant after a warm wet summer has made it a bumper year for the powdery mildews that destroy fruit and vegetables<\/p>\n

The white powdery fungal disease kills and maims apples (good I never liked those arrogant fuckers<\/em>) blackcurrants (weak<\/em>), gooseberries, (queers<\/em>) and courgettes and marrows (they have one fucking use<\/em>)<\/p>\n

Roses (think of me<\/em>) and Honeysuckle (and smell my cunt<\/em>) are also affected. It has also caused problems for farmers as it attacks sugar beet (the sweetness of my lips<\/em>) and barley (boring just fucking<\/em> boring<\/em>)<\/p>\n

This has been a bumper year for powdery mildews \u2013” we have had a dry summer with a bit of wetness (think of me<\/em>) and then it has become dry again” said Peter Jenkins the senior horticultural adviser at the RHG (That is bloody obvious even a fucking albino would know that<\/em>)<\/p>\n

These can kill but usually maim and weaken plants. In vegetables this can reduce the size and shorten the yield (boring boring<\/em>)<\/p>\n

“It kills off some of the shoots and can damage the plants for the following year” added Mr Jenkins<\/p>\n

“The mildew season peaks around now” he said as he took his hand off of my breast (do not worry my<\/em> love I have kicked the fucker down the stairs)
\n<\/em><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Born In Torquay<\/b><\/p>\n

I found ChiChiChi in a greasy caf\u00e9 not far from the prison. She was wearing my favourite fisherman\u2019s sweater and faded blue jeans and was barefoot as normal
\n<\/i><\/p>\n

She never wore shoes as she wanted to feel the pulse of the world every time she walked <\/i><\/p>\n

One would have thought that her feet would have been soiled and torn yet they were as clean as if they had recently been bathed<\/i><\/p>\n

Next to her was a striking man with a thick moustache and the most piercing eyes<\/i><\/p>\n

His cheek also was badly scarred <\/i><\/p>\n

He did not say much and I considered him to be foreign but like me he had been born in Torquay <\/i><\/p>\n

He ordered three breakfasts of egg sausages fried bread and beans but told us not to eat what was in front of us<\/i><\/p>\n

This confused the waitress as he declined tea <\/i><\/p>\n

He explained that if we stared at our breakfast for long enough and imagined flying saucers then we would understand the fundamentals of space travel<\/i><\/p>\n

He had discovered this over one hundred years previously when in Africa <\/i><\/p>\n

I told him of my interest in mildew and that I was an albino <\/i><\/p>\n

This was of no consequence he added <\/i><\/p>\n

He declined our invitation to accompany us as he had a pressing engagement in Barnes <\/i><\/p>\n

About five minutes later he left <\/i><\/p>\n

ChiChiChi and I stared at our breakfast and soon we were travelling in space<\/i><\/p>\n

The whole concept was so simple I thought as we circled the solar system hand in hand <\/i><\/p>\n

We decided to settle on one of Jupiter\u2019s moons where I built a castle in my dreams <\/i><\/p>\n

We often played Chopin together as the distant sun sank and when it was totally dark wrote love letters to each other of the most beautiful blue paper in the universe<\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u00a0
\n<\/b><\/i><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/i><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/i><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Chopin ChiChiChi and I were sitting at a piano We were both playing Chopin quite violently I was playing a Nocturne and she a Funeral March We each had our own appreciative audience As we touched the cold keys I realised that it was my turn to be the albino so I retired to the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1188"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1188"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1188\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1188"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1188"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1188"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}