{"id":12280,"date":"2023-01-18T16:33:27","date_gmt":"2023-01-18T16:33:27","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.co.uk\/?p=12280"},"modified":"2023-01-18T16:33:27","modified_gmt":"2023-01-18T16:33:27","slug":"the-amateur-assassin","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/2023\/01\/18\/the-amateur-assassin\/","title":{"rendered":"The Amateur Assassin\u00a0<\/strong>"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

What are you doing Stan <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Writing as normal <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Or rather thinking then writing <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Do you realise that thousands of turkeys and thousands of trees <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Is this going to be a Christmas fact Stan <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Are slaughtered each year to celebrate a single birth <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Not listening Stan not listening Stan <\/p>\n\n\n\n

La la La la La La <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Finished yet <\/p>\n\n\n\n

That is an interesting fact <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Suppose you are a turkey happy in a yard <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Living a turkeys life <\/p>\n\n\n\n

You have turkey plans <\/p>\n\n\n\n

And then you are cruelly executed <\/p>\n\n\n\n

And end up on the plate of some fat cunt you shits you out a few hours later <\/p>\n\n\n\n

La La La La La La <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Do you think that God wants that as he loves his all of his creatures <\/p>\n\n\n\n

And then we kill therm <\/p>\n\n\n\n

But we are veggies Stan <\/p>\n\n\n\n

That is because we have seen the light <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Many others have not <\/p>\n\n\n\n

The turkey I was talking about might have understood the Tractatus Logico Philosophicus                                                 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

What makes you think that <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Because I do not know <\/p>\n\n\n\n

And now the poor creature is in the body of the fat cunt next door <\/p>\n\n\n\n

It is also in the fridge ready for sandwiches <\/p>\n\n\n\n

The fat cunt might be going to the park with his family <\/p>\n\n\n\n

It is Christmas after all<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The cat will eat the rest and shit in the residential gardens <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I wonder what Ludwig would have made of that <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Fuck knows <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Stan <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Yes <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Why have you written <\/p>\n\n\n\n

The Amateur Assassin on your blotting pad <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Why should I have not written The Amateur Assassin on my blotting pad<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Are there any laws in the universe that say that I should not do this <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I might have just as easily written monkey on the blotting pad <\/p>\n\n\n\n

But you have written The Amateur Assassin on your blotting pad <\/p>\n\n\n\n

That is because we are all amateurs <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Amateur people <\/p>\n\n\n\n

If I decided to assassinate lets say a politician who has offended me with his or her views<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Would I be anything more than an amateur assassin <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nobody is paying me <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I am assassinating the said cunt because I disagree with his or her views <\/p>\n\n\n\n

It is likely that I would be successful at least once <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Maybe twice or a number of times <\/p>\n\n\n\n

But I would be caught <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Because you are an amateur <\/p>\n\n\n\n

No because I would become careless <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Would a professional assassin fall into this trap <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Yes possibly the only difference is the money <\/p>\n\n\n\n

There are many people who in theory offend me <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Stan you are a Christian <\/p>\n\n\n\n

God would not be pleased with you <\/p>\n\n\n\n

God would understand <\/p>\n\n\n\n

God is Love <\/p>\n\n\n\n

He would understand that I was forced to assassinate a monster <\/p>\n\n\n\n

A monster in your eyes Stan <\/p>\n\n\n\n

A monster who would cause harm to those who cannot defend themselves <\/p>\n\n\n\n

He would understand <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I would be caught and told how evil I was by a judge who watches pornography in his spare time and discreetly seeks the company of whores or rent boys when nobody is looking <\/p>\n\n\n\n

That is a bleak outlook Stan <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Do you dispute my thoughts <\/p>\n\n\n\n

No I know that this does happen <\/p>\n\n\n\n

This judge has the power over me and if there was a death penalty would send me to the gallows<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Instead he would tell me what a piece of shit I was and send me to prison for a long time <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I would be a hero to many <\/p>\n\n\n\n

They would admire me <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I would write books in prison explaining my thoughts and subsequent actions <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I am not an animal <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I am Love <\/p>\n\n\n\n

In time they would bore of me and I would be released <\/p>\n\n\n\n

After all I only assassinated those who had it coming <\/p>\n\n\n\n

After my release I would seek out the final resting places of those I have assassinated and stand over them <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I would not gloat as to gloat is cheap but I would whisper to them that I am love and that is why I killed you <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I am sorry that I killed you but I am Love <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Others might have agreed with their views <\/p>\n\n\n\n

They may have been buried at sea<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That would fuck you up <\/p>\n\n\n\n

In many ways I agree with you Stan but you cannot be a judge a jury and an executioner <\/p>\n\n\n\n

You have a point Jane but someone has to stop the runaway train before the final station<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This is not really a festive conversation Stan <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I agree <\/p>\n\n\n\n

You would never kill anyone <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Possibly <\/p>\n\n\n\n

All your assassinations and gruesome deeds occur in your poems and fictions <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Agreed <\/p>\n\n\n\n

You would not even hurt a troublesome insect <\/p>\n\n\n\n

You are Love Stan <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Are you going to complete your fiction <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I am almost there <\/p>\n\n\n\n

It would be nice to just drift around London and maybe hook up with friends <\/p>\n\n\n\n

The walk would be just an excellent excuse to watch the day pass before us <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I will be ready in ten <\/p>\n\n\n\n

You <\/p>\n\n\n\n

The same <\/p>\n\n\n\n

There I have thrown my pen into the bin <\/p>\n\n\n\n

My fiction is complete <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Stan <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Jane <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Who is the main character in this fiction <\/p>\n\n\n\n

William Wilson <\/p>\n\n\n\n

A chap named William Wilson   <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Note <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Turkeys do not read or understand Ludwig Wittgenstein<\/em>
Is a coffee shop in Covent Garden 
Stan and Jane have invested into this business 
They are planning to expand in 2023 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

What are you doing Stan  Writing as normal  Or rather thinking then writing  Do you realise that thousands of turkeys and thousands of trees  Is this going to be a Christmas fact Stan  Are slaughtered each year to celebrate a single birth  Not listening Stan not listening Stan  La la La la La La  Finished […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-12280","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12280","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=12280"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12280\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":12281,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12280\/revisions\/12281"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=12280"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=12280"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=12280"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}