{"id":13255,"date":"2023-03-08T22:00:47","date_gmt":"2023-03-08T22:00:47","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.co.uk\/?p=13255"},"modified":"2023-03-08T22:44:51","modified_gmt":"2023-03-08T22:44:51","slug":"t-r-o-m-b-o-n-e-s-a-n-d-t-h-e-c-o-d-w-a-r-s","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/2023\/03\/08\/t-r-o-m-b-o-n-e-s-a-n-d-t-h-e-c-o-d-w-a-r-s\/","title":{"rendered":"T.R.O.M.B.O.N.E.S A.N.D T.H.E C.O.D W.A.R.S"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I was in The Swing Cafe when I met a gorgeous sailor <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Who lured me on to his Icelandic fishing boat <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And when there showed me his large trombone<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I was unimpressed and asked him to wear a cotton frock<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">After he had slowly changed if front of me  <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I threw him into the freezing sea <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Which fucked off the C.O.D to say the least <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And because of this the war started <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">C.O.D against C.O.D<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Boat against Boat <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Sailor against Sailor<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Trombone against Trombone<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">On the day after the war ended <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I was handed a will <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Which noted that I had been left <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">A  real trombone and real Icelandic fishing boat <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I now live in Stallingborough above the Swing Cafe <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And pick up nubile sailors with the promise <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Of seeing and touching my large trombone <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Before I throw them into the freezing sea<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"> Off of the southern coast of I.C.E.L.A.N.D<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">With the explicit permission of the resident C.O.D<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I was in The Swing Cafe when I met a gorgeous sailor Who lured me on to his Icelandic fishing boat And when there showed me his large trombone I was unimpressed and asked him to wear a cotton frock After he had slowly changed if front of me I threw him into the freezing [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-13255","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13255","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=13255"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13255\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":13264,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13255\/revisions\/13264"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=13255"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=13255"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=13255"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}