{"id":17970,"date":"2023-12-10T12:32:29","date_gmt":"2023-12-10T12:32:29","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.co.uk\/?p=17970"},"modified":"2023-12-10T15:27:48","modified_gmt":"2023-12-10T15:27:48","slug":"le-testament-de-joe","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/2023\/12\/10\/le-testament-de-joe\/","title":{"rendered":"Le testament de Joe"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<pre id=\"tw-target-text\" class=\"wp-block-preformatted\">What is that Joe \n\nIt is a pad and a blue pen \n\nWhat are you writing \n\nI am not writing I am talking to you \n\nWhy are you in the bathroom Joe \n\nBecause you are in the bath \n\nAnd I am talking to you \n\nIt is going to be one of those days Joe \n\nWhat days \n\nThe Joe being witty days \n\nBut what are you writing \n\nLe testament de Joe\n\nWhy in French \n\nI speak French \n\nRead it to me \n\nOnce upon a time \n\nSeriously Joe \n\nI am recounting the story of what happened in a county town a decade or so ago \n\nWhat happened \n\nA woman was arrested by the cops \n\nWhy \n\nYou are using my flannel Josie \n\nIt is my flannel Joe \n\nMine was the red one we agreed \n\nNo yours was the pink one \n\nNo I think you are wrong \n\nYours was the pink one \n\nI am no faggot \n\nBack to your poem Joe \n\nWhy was the woman arrested \n\nBecause she walked down the high street topless \n\nReally \n\nYes \n\nIs that all she was arrested for \n\nYes \n\nDid she give a reason for doing it \n\nIt was a hot day \n\nShe noted that there were a few men without shirts that day and the cops left them alone \n\nDid they warn her \n\nNo she was arrested \n\nFor what \n\nIf I remember correctly for behaviour liable to cause a breach of the peace \n\nWas she attractive like me \n\nI do not have a clue \n\nShe might have been a fat slag or a Josie in a bath \n\nI just read the report \n\nThere were no photographs \n\nWas she fined \n\nNo only given a warning \n\nDid she say why she did it \n\nYes \n\nWhy \n\nEquality \n\nHer reasoning was that guys and girls are supposed to be equal \n\nMen frequently remove their shirts and nothing is said \n\nBut if a woman goes topless then she is committing a crime \n\nIs that equality \n\nNo \n\nIf the law banned men from removing their shirts then fair enough but it does not \n\nIs that the subject of your poem \n\nYes and no \n\nMy point is what is offensive and what is not \n\nAs I said this happened a considerable time ago \n\nIt never really caught on \n\nToo fucking cold in this country \n\nI agree Josie \n\nBut a few weeks ago I was in the same town buying a book when I saw a pervert wearing a dress \n\nWas it a nice dress Joe \n\nDo not be trite Josie otherwise I will turn the cold water on \n\nDid it make you angry Joe \n\nI felt sick \n\nWere there others like you \n\nHe was shouted at by a few decent people \n\nEspecially with brats \n\nBut overall he was ignored \n\nThe thing that really fucked me off was that there were some cops nearby \n\nWhy were they there \n\nIt seems that some of the illegals were nicking stuff from the shops \n\nOr at least that was what I was told \n\nI am answering my own question but I take it that the cops did fuck all \n\nSpot on \n\nThere was this pervert who was as tall as me walking down the same high street that the woman used before she was arrested \n\nThe cops did nothing \n\nThat is what sickened me \n\nAnd \n\nThis chick with a dick was obviously mentally ill \n\nMen who do this are obviously misogynists narcissists and fetishists all rolled into one \n\nIn theory they are dangerous people \n\nBut the cops ignored this pervert \n\nIf I had walked down the street wearing a SS uniform then they would have arrested me \n\nIf you had walked down the street without a shirt it is likely you would have been arrested\n\nThere is worse to come \n\nCan it get any worse \n\nIt can \n\nDid you notice that when I returned \n\nI did not bring you a gift \n\nI did Joe and it was not good enough \n\nYou know how quickly my vibrator batteries run out \n\nUse your fingers Josie it is much cheaper \n\nI was going to buy you some perfumed soaps\n\nFrench ones \n\nNo African ones \n\nI do not like the African ones \n\nThey smell of dead missionaries \n\nYou would have received French ones \n\nLavande\n\nOui \n\nCitron\n\nOui \n\nViolette\n\nOui \n\nAnd many other flavours \n\nYou like me smelling sweet\n\nIt is better than fish Josie \n\nYou are such a cunt Joe \n\nI do not want your perfumed soaps \n\nFine with me \n\nDo tell me about the perfumed soaps Joe \n\nWell I normally get the soaps you like from Superdrug \n\nThat is a bit upmarket for you Joe \n\nI agree \n\nBut you like their soaps \n\nWell I had picked up three boxes and was approaching the counter when I saw the chick with a dick serving the customers \n\nOn his name badge it noted his name as Claudia \n\nI just walked out of the shop\n\nAnd I did not get any soaps \n\nDo not be spoilt Josie \n\nYou must realise that there are quotas \n\nQuotas my arse \n\nIt is diversity and companies need to be seen as inclusive \n\nThat is why you see trains and buses promoting sodomy and other perversions \n\nInstead of employing decent people they employ perverts  \n\nWhen I worked in the Civil Service Joe I remember that they once employed a crip with special needs \n\nA great deal of taxpayers money was spent in adapting his work station\n\nHe was from some God forsaken country and had issues probably due to inbreeding I would imagine\n\nYou did not tell me this Josie \n\nI knew it would fuck you off \n\nDid he like football \n\nNo \n\nThen he was probably a faggot \n\nHe was \n\nHe was fucking his support worker \n\nGroomed \n\nVery much \n\nThe wheelchair probably got in the way \n\nThat is very likely \n\nThe wheelchair that was supplied by the state \n\nEnough Josie \n\nDo you know what the punch line is \n\nNo \n\nThe crip quit after a month or so \n\nHe could not deal with the demands of the job \n\nMary did tell me that the cost to the office was a fucking fortune \n\nJust to comply with malignant quotas  \n\nAll wasted \n\nA rather nice girl from Richmond replaced him \n\nAble bodied \n\nYou would have fucked her Joe \n\nShe had previously applied for the post but was overlooked in favour of the faggot crip \n\nThat just illustrates malignancy of society today \n\nDid you contact Superdrug \n\nYes \n\nAnd \n\nThey replied with the normal shit \n\nThe sad thing is that I am not a violent man \n\nYou tell me you are dangerous \n\nIn another sense \n\nAll decent men are dangerous \n\nThe difference is that they know how to control it \n\nBut if required they can use it for the good \n\nSome men who are not dangerous are the weak ones \n\nThey are although normally quite nice people just not useful when called upon  \n\nAs I was saying if I found out this pervert had been given a good thrashing \n\nI would not feel sorry for it \n\nThey would have brought it on themselves \n\nYou say the same about faggots \n\nI do \n\nThese people bring it on themselves \n\nJoe \n\nThe water has cooled \n\nWe have been chatting for quite a while \n\nWe have \n\nPass me a towel \n\nNo \n\nWhy \n\nWhat are you doing \n\nHaving a shit \n\nI am having a bath\n\nI can see that \n\nYou are so gross \n\nA monster \n\nA savage \n\nIt is your cooking Josie \n\nWell cook your own fucking meals \n\nI cannot cook \n\nYou will not cook \n\nIt is a girlies job \n\nWell this girlie is going to let you starve \n\nBitch \n\nWhere are you going \n\nOut of this room \n\nIt smells like a sewer \n\nAnd open the window \n\nI will think about it  \n\n\n\nJoe &amp; Josie Go Boating \n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n \n\n\n\n\n\n<\/pre>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>What is that Joe It is a pad and a blue pen What are you writing I am not writing I am talking to you Why are you in the bathroom Joe Because you are in the bath And I am talking to you It is going to be one of those days Joe What [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-17970","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17970","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=17970"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17970\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":17976,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17970\/revisions\/17976"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=17970"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=17970"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=17970"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}