Kitty <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I have a friend named Kitty <\/p>\n\n\n\n
She is very attractive <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I have always been in awe<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Of her considerable beauty <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Yesterday I met Kitty in the park <\/p>\n\n\n\n
And she asked me if I would like <\/p>\n\n\n\n
To see her kitty <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I could not believe my luck <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Kitty’s Kitty <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I was told to turn around <\/p>\n\n\n\n
And close my hungry eyes <\/p>\n\n\n\n
This I did without argument <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Kitty then asked me to face her <\/p>\n\n\n\n
And open my eyes <\/p>\n\n\n\n
She handed me a mirror
Marxist Intellectual <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I was invited to the local university <\/p>\n\n\n\n
To give a poetry reading <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Rimbaud and Lautr\u00e9amont<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The poor students <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Looked at me with blank eyes <\/p>\n\n\n\n
As did most of the academics <\/p>\n\n\n\n
After the reading Jackie <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Introduced me to her professor <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Who she said was a Marxist Intellectual <\/p>\n\n\n\n
What is a Marxist Intellectual I asked <\/p>\n\n\n\n
As I stared into the void
Under the Skin <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I met Kitty’s friend Sandra <\/p>\n\n\n\n
At a Christmas Party <\/p>\n\n\n\n
She was the ugliest woman <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I had ever seen <\/p>\n\n\n\n
At a guess she was size twenty <\/p>\n\n\n\n
With fat on her fat in her fat <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I lost count of her chins <\/p>\n\n\n\n
She had the dress sense <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Of a sloth on heat <\/p>\n\n\n\n
But I was nice to her <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Yet wished I was blind <\/p>\n\n\n\n
After the party ended <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Kitty walked me home <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Through the park <\/p>\n\n\n\n
As I was afraid of getting raped <\/p>\n\n\n\n
We discussed Sandra <\/p>\n\n\n\n
As we watched a trans bashing <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Near the ornamental pond <\/p>\n\n\n\n
She asked me why I found Sandra gross <\/p>\n\n\n\n
As we are all beautiful under the skin <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I disagreed and said that without her skin <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Sandra would be a mound of rotting viscera <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Covered in a mass of fat fat fat <\/p>\n\n\n\n
And although Sandra was pretty gross <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I felt that we were getting the best deal
Not My Joke<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Every Tuesday after Mass <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Kitty and I would lie on our beds <\/p>\n\n\n\n
And masturbate together <\/p>\n\n\n\n
We often chatted and put the world in order<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Yesterday we discussed our favourite jokes <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Kitty’s favourite was <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Do you realise that Princess Diana was on the radio when she died <\/p>\n\n\n\n
(I have still to work that one out) <\/p>\n\n\n\n
A Jimmy Carr joke was my choice <\/p>\n\n\n\n
How do you get a faggot to fuck a woman <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Shit up her cunt <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I am so glad that Kitty is my friend <\/p>\n\n\n\n
And that she is going to Lourdes with me <\/p>\n\n\n\n
After her gender reassignment is complete
Sick Boy<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Kitty I have a friend named Kitty She is very attractive I have always been in awe Of her considerable beauty Yesterday I met Kitty in the park And she asked me if I would like To see her kitty I could not believe my luck Kitty’s Kitty I was told to turn around And […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-18808","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18808","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=18808"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18808\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":18817,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18808\/revisions\/18817"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=18808"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=18808"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=18808"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}