{"id":20052,"date":"2024-04-17T07:31:57","date_gmt":"2024-04-17T06:31:57","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.co.uk\/?p=20052"},"modified":"2024-04-17T09:58:02","modified_gmt":"2024-04-17T08:58:02","slug":"prison-notebooks","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/2024\/04\/17\/prison-notebooks\/","title":{"rendered":"<em>Prison Notebooks<\/em>"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Joe<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Mo <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Joe<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">What are you writing on the napkin<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">A list of people who I think should be assassinated <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">You will get in trouble mate <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">For writing the names of certain people who I dislike on a napkin in MCD <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It is not a police state yet <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">You noted in a recent video that you have spent time in prison <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Yes <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Why did you go to prison <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Because I thumped an idiot who called Josie a cunt <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Explain <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It happened when we were getting on a train in Manchester <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">There was a drunk in the doorway <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I told him to move<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">He told me to fuck myself and drew a knife<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Do you still have the sketch <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Yes it is the framed blue one in the bog <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Josie who was to my left <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Tried to step over him <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">He looked up her dress <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Commando <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It was summer <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Nice<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">No Manchester Piccadilly <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">So I stamped on his fingers <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">By doing this he bumped into Josie <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Who knocked his mobile out of his hand by accident <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It fell into the space between the platform and the train <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">That is when he called her a stupid fucking bitch <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">She called him a drunken pervert<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And he called her a cunt bitch and shoved her <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">That was enough for me and I flattened him with a hay maker <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">That is when the cops were called and to my surprise I was arrested by a brown one who had the IQ of a slug <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I was later taken to the pig farm and thrown in a cell <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Josie was also arrested as she swore at the cops <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The difference was that she was released without charge <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Why was that <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">She licked out the chief constable <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Dyke <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Yes <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Dodgy haircut <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Yes <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Ugly <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">As fuck <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I was charged as the cops wanted to keep up their stats <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And long story short I was sent to prison <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Really <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I was put on suicide watch <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Were you a risk <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">No <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Then why <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">When I say suicide watch I was in exchange for an early release made to watch  videos of people with mental health problems jumping in front of trains <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">How horrible <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I rather enjoyed it Mo <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It was rather like watching cows being totalled by the express trains in India <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">They really explode <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">What did you do to pass the time apart from wanking <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I chatted to the other primates <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And we shared our copies of Prison Notebooks by Antonio Gramsci and a few custard mags which had been stolen from the office of the prison governor <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">What were the mags like <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Sticky <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The usual barely legal stuff <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">They sickened me so much<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"> That I reported them <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">As I love hamsters <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And because of that the prison governor was arrested and all the inmates were treated to a series of film nights <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Wow what movies were shown <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It was an eclectic bunch <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Attica <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Henry Portrait of a Serial Killer <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Bambi <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And The Birdman of Alcatraz <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">What was your favourite <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The Birdman of Alcatraz <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Why <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Because we all were given a bird to look after in our cells <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">That was nice <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">What type of birds <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Sparrows Robins Ospreys and the like <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">What type of bird were you given <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">An Albatross <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Did you nurse it back to health <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">No <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Why <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Because it was dead <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It had been cut in half by a train hours earlier <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Could you see the trains from your cell window <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Yes <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Did you like seeing the passing trains <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">No <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Why you like trains Joe <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">They were all on strike <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Here look name number seven on the napkin <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">John Smith <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Who is that <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The malignant strike leader <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I think you will find out that she is The Bishop of Bath &amp; Wells Joe <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Really <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Yes <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Thanks for that <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Joe why do you think that you were sent to prison <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Because I am a poet and occasionally I am banned from Linkedin <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Wow<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Yes and I broke the jaw of the low life who called Josie a cunt <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">You have called Josie a cunt many times <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">She is a cunt <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Double standards there Joe <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Possibly <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I know the real reason though <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">A prison visitor told me <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Who was that <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Lola her name was Lola <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Was she hot <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Not really as I had a cold cell <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">You were telling me the reason why you got life without parole <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The reason was that the idiot I thumped was a member of the Royal Family who had been out on the piss <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">By breaking his jaw he was unable to make a speech to the UN asking for world peace and the reintroduction of slavery<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Cool<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">How long were you in prison Joe <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Twenty-three minutes <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">They certainly hung you out to dry <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I know <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Were you scarred by your experience <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Yes I sat on a hot water pipe when having a shit <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">But that said I have a lucrative deal for my prison notebooks <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">That and a signed photograph of Katie Starbucks taking the knee <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Nuff Said <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Nuff Said  <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Joe &amp; Mo <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Joe Mo Joe What are you writing on the napkin A list of people who I think should be assassinated You will get in trouble mate For writing the names of certain people who I dislike on a napkin in MCD It is not a police state yet You noted in a recent video that [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-20052","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20052","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=20052"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20052\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":20062,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20052\/revisions\/20062"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=20052"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=20052"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=20052"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}