To all my friends\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n
A question <\/p>\n\n\n\n
How many of you masturbate at work <\/p>\n\n\n\n
A quick trip to the gender friendly bogs <\/p>\n\n\n\n
The Pleasure Palace awaits <\/p>\n\n\n\n
But do clean up the mess <\/p>\n\n\n\n
As the tiled floors <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Can be slippery and dangerous <\/p>\n\n\n\n
A recent survey noted <\/p>\n\n\n\n
That over 40% of employees <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Masturbate at work <\/p>\n\n\n\n
10% in meetings <\/p>\n\n\n\n
And 7% in their 121s <\/p>\n\n\n\n
The split is roughly 70\/30 <\/p>\n\n\n\n
(make up your own mind) <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Senior Managers are more likely <\/p>\n\n\n\n
To masturbate at work <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Hence their job titles <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I am a train driver <\/p>\n\n\n\n
And masturbating at work <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Is explicitly banned <\/p>\n\n\n\n
As the cum goes all over <\/p>\n\n\n\n
The windows of the cab <\/p>\n\n\n\n
And obscures signals at danger <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I am striking with my comrades <\/p>\n\n\n\n
During the next month <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Because of this infringement <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Of our hard won freedoms <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Somebody suggested female train drivers <\/p>\n\n\n\n
But they often get hopelessly lost <\/p>\n\n\n\n
The Euston to Glasgow express <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Ended up in Truro last week<\/p>\n\n\n\n
As the driver was on the rag <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Which occupied her spare hand<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Thank you for giving me the opportunity <\/p>\n\n\n\n
To discuss this taboo subject <\/p>\n\n\n\n
And remember<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Always wash your hands <\/p>\n\n\n\n
As others use <\/p>\n\n\n\n
The coffee machines <\/p>\n\n\n\n
After you<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Just a little tip my friends <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Silly Boy xxx<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
To all my friends\u00a0 A question How many of you masturbate at work A quick trip to the gender friendly bogs The Pleasure Palace awaits But do clean up the mess As the tiled floors Can be slippery and dangerous A recent survey noted That over 40% of employees Masturbate at work 10% in meetings […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-20404","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20404","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=20404"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20404\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":20405,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20404\/revisions\/20405"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=20404"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=20404"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=20404"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}