Poor Joe has been unwell <\/p>\n\n\n\n
The normal type of unwell <\/p>\n\n\n\n
But unwell and so fucking moody <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Today in beautiful Richmond <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Whilst I was walking by the river <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I started to feel doolally <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I rested not far from Virginia <\/p>\n\n\n\n
She ignored me as normal <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Damn it Sky Daddy I feel so nauseous<\/p>\n\n\n\n
So I went to the nearest public bog <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I just did not want to disgrace myself <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Toilets in Richmond apart from being faggot free <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Are pretty clean apart from the odd floater<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Which is acceptable (without any back splash) <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I was sitting there reading the invisible graffiti <\/p>\n\n\n\n
When I noticed that a passing homeless person <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Had stolen the lilac bog paper to keep warm <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I found this cheap and disgusting <\/p>\n\n\n\n
But not as disgusting as I soon <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Found a copy of The Guardian <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Hidden in a corner of the cubicle<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Initially I thought there was a porno mag enclosed <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Instead of the putrid lies and false news <\/p>\n\n\n\n
But there were no faggot mags inside <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I have a confession to make <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Joe has a confession to make <\/p>\n\n\n\n
No not about that I just like French actresses naked<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I like underarm hair <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I really like underarm hair<\/p>\n\n\n\n
On beautiful women (not dogs) <\/p>\n\n\n\n
It just turns me on no matter the colour <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Bald or bush I am not that fussy or really care <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Josie is often shaven depending who is visiting <\/p>\n\n\n\n
But I do insist that she does not shave her pits <\/p>\n\n\n\n
An odd peccadillo maybe but at least <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I am not a trainspotter named Nigel <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Sensible time again<\/p>\n\n\n\n
My confession <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Have I ever wept in a cinema <\/p>\n\n\n\n
(Wept Mr Wilson Wept) <\/p>\n\n\n\n
What do you think <\/p>\n\n\n\n
The answer is yes when I was eighteen <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Why <\/p>\n\n\n\n
It was a bloody Italian film <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Rome Open City <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I went in without thought <\/p>\n\n\n\n
As it was on a double bill with Sleeping in Seattle <\/p>\n\n\n\n
(Yes I confess I have the hots for Meg Ryan now fuck off) <\/p>\n\n\n\n
But the Italian film blew me away <\/p>\n\n\n\n
(Take that grin off your face Tomkins)<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It was unlike anything I had ever seen before <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I thought that Italian neo-realism<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Was the chap from the Matrix <\/p>\n\n\n\n
But it was far more than that <\/p>\n\n\n\n
The title of the movie if you understand it <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Gave a clue that I did not instantly recognise <\/p>\n\n\n\n
As the movie progressed I felt my eyes filling <\/p>\n\n\n\n
And when Pina was shot towards the end of part one <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I was in full flow but disguised my queerness <\/p>\n\n\n\n
By pretending that I had a cold <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I was so so hooked and caught up with <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Germany Year Zero <\/p>\n\n\n\n
The following week along with Bambi (do not ask)<\/p>\n\n\n\n
My cinema had matured <\/p>\n\n\n\n
A month or so later I took an early girlfriend <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Jemima Puddle-Duck<\/p>\n\n\n\n
To see Sal\u00f2 o le 120 giornate di Sodoma<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n She was not impressed <\/p>\n\n\n\n So we caught up with <\/p>\n\n\n\n Last Tango in Paris the next day <\/p>\n\n\n\n We had butter sandwiches <\/p>\n\n\n\n And listened to Cigarettes After Sex <\/p>\n\n\n\n After a messy wank <\/p>\n\n\n\n Happy memories <\/p>\n\n\n\n But this actually confused me <\/p>\n\n\n\n As I had never met a horny cigarette <\/p>\n\n\n\n Nuff Said Joe Nuff Said <\/p>\n\n\n\n And even Novice Nuns deserve orgasms <\/p>\n\n\n\n Nuff Said Joe Nuff Said <\/p>\n\n\n\n But here I am still on this bog <\/p>\n\n\n\n Wiping my arse with The Guardian <\/p>\n\n\n\n I have totally obscured the likeness <\/p>\n\n\n\n Of Jeremy Corbyn which I do not regret <\/p>\n\n\n\n Whether you like it or not (tick here)<\/p>\n\n\n\n I have written this Joe on my phone <\/p>\n\n\n\n (I have washed my hands so do not worry)<\/p>\n\n\n\n On the wall opposite the pristine sinks <\/p>\n\n\n\n An idiot had applied a colourful sticker <\/p>\n\n\n\n It reads<\/p>\n\n\n\n Free Palestine <\/p>\n\n\n\n This has alarmed me <\/p>\n\n\n\n As I have always thought <\/p>\n\n\n\n That one was enough<\/p>\n\n\n\n A pretty girl walks in <\/p>\n\n\n\n Fellow users pretend to stop pissing <\/p>\n\n\n\n And wank openly <\/p>\n\n\n\n (I am a poet get me out of here)<\/p>\n\n\n\n Josie is wearing a white vest <\/p>\n\n\n\n Her dark nipples <\/p>\n\n\n\n Can be seen through the cotton <\/p>\n\n\n\n But importantly <\/p>\n\n\n\n Her hairy pits are on display <\/p>\n\n\n\n I feel better <\/p>\n\n\n\n She has come to collect me <\/p>\n\n\n\n As this is where I normally hang out <\/p>\n\n\n\n When I am not near Virginia <\/p>\n\n\n\n On that bench facing the river <\/p>\n\n\n\n Poor Joe you are in <\/p>\n\n\n\n La La Land again <\/p>\n\n\n\n I insist that I was not in the first movie <\/p>\n\n\n\n And have never visited Los Angeles <\/p>\n\n\n\n I ask that I be called Adeline <\/p>\n\n\n\n For the remainder of the day <\/p>\n\n\n\n <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Poor Joe has been unwell The normal type of unwell But unwell and so fucking moody Today in beautiful Richmond Whilst I was walking by the river I started to feel doolally I rested not far from Virginia She ignored me as normal Damn it Sky Daddy I feel so nauseous So I went to […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-20527","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20527","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=20527"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20527\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":20538,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20527\/revisions\/20538"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=20527"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=20527"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=20527"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
Fin<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Doolally Joe & His Caring Sister <\/p>\n\n\n\n