After he broke up with Maureen the Crane Fly <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Silly Boy felt suicidal <\/p>\n\n\n\n
He tried jumping from packets of cigarettes <\/p>\n\n\n\n
And bags of loose tobacco <\/p>\n\n\n\n
But only became addicted to snuff movies<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Which confused him <\/p>\n\n\n\n
As nobody used snuff <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I suggested that he should try Beachy Head <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Which he did <\/p>\n\n\n\n
But as normal became confused <\/p>\n\n\n\n
There was a sign next to Arthur’s greenhouse <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Recommending a pub called <\/p>\n\n\n\n
The Samaritans <\/p>\n\n\n\n
But he was unable to find it <\/p>\n\n\n\n
So he settled for a pint <\/p>\n\n\n\n
At another pub nearby <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Jump you Fucker Jump <\/p>\n\n\n\n
He rang me<\/p>\n\n\n\n
(not a good idea as I seldom wash) <\/p>\n\n\n\n
And said that he was a little cold <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I suggested that he pop into Eastbourne <\/p>\n\n\n\n
And treat himself to a new jumper <\/p>\n\n\n\n
This he did but the green assistant <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Who was very thick <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Gave him a mangled corpse <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Freshly dead in a lovely Hermes bag<\/p>\n\n\n\n
This depressed Silly Boy <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Who decided to end it all<\/p>\n\n\n\n
By jumping out of the basement window<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He did not even get this right <\/p>\n\n\n\n
And only succeeded in squashing <\/p>\n\n\n\n
The cat next door<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Who was not impressed <\/p>\n\n\n\n
As it had only just returned <\/p>\n\n\n\n
From visiting its flat mate <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
After he broke up with Maureen the Crane Fly Silly Boy felt suicidal He tried jumping from packets of cigarettes And bags of loose tobacco But only became addicted to snuff movies Which confused him As nobody used snuff I suggested that he should try Beachy Head Which he did But as normal became confused […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-23840","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/23840","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=23840"}],"version-history":[{"count":9,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/23840\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":23851,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/23840\/revisions\/23851"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=23840"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=23840"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=23840"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}