{"id":25217,"date":"2025-03-11T16:00:05","date_gmt":"2025-03-11T16:00:05","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/?p=25217"},"modified":"2025-03-11T18:23:50","modified_gmt":"2025-03-11T18:23:50","slug":"feeding-the-cat","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/2025\/03\/11\/feeding-the-cat\/","title":{"rendered":"Feeding the Cat"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Sally and I enjoy our summers <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">But our fun is diluted by Rufus <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Who is Rufus <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The cat next door <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It belongs to Betty and Phil <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">A cat so thick that if often forgets to eat <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">So to help him to remember <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">We purchased an all singing all dancing cat feeder <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Which lit up when it was time for Rufus to eat <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">All the colours of the rainbow disco flashed<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It could be seen from the fucking moon  <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Another feature was It played hard techno <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">From all of its many speakers <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">How did it go <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Did Betty and Phil enjoy their holiday <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It did not go well<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Why <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I forgot to put a battery in <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And the fucking cat starved to death <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Shit happens mate <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Shit happens <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Betty and Phil were pissed with me <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And would not accept a stuffed<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"> Spanish Donkey <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">As a way of saying sorry <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"> My hamster Percy is now receiving<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"> Death threats from the Cats Protection League <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Sally and I enjoy our summers But our fun is diluted by Rufus Who is Rufus The cat next door It belongs to Betty and Phil A cat so thick that if often forgets to eat So to help him to remember We purchased an all singing all dancing cat feeder Which lit up when [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-25217","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25217","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=25217"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25217\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":25222,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25217\/revisions\/25222"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=25217"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=25217"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=25217"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}