{"id":26845,"date":"2025-06-03T13:23:17","date_gmt":"2025-06-03T12:23:17","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/?p=26845"},"modified":"2025-06-03T14:59:27","modified_gmt":"2025-06-03T13:59:27","slug":"mike-and-monika-visit-cape-cod","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/2025\/06\/03\/mike-and-monika-visit-cape-cod\/","title":{"rendered":"Mike and Monika visit Cape Cod"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Mike show me your new tattoo <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">No <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Y <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Because the sun is too strong <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Give me a clue <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It is mathematical <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I have shaped my pubic bush <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Really do show <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It is here hidden under my bikini pants <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Do show <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>It is a work of art dear heart <\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I have a question <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Why if you are a Nordic Blonde <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Is you landing strip black <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Methinks it a sign of racial impurity <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Far from it as my father came from Grimsby <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">So did mine <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Are we related <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">There is not a single next number after pi because pi is an irrational number <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Stop it Mike as you are making me wet <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">This means its decimal representation goes on forever without repeating <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">What are you doing Monika <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Masturbating <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Did you not read the signs <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">What signs <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">No Masturbating on the Beach <br>During Daylight Hours <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It is not like a fraction <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Where one can find <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The next number in sequence <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Fuck you Mike I am squirting <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Shit shit shit and shit<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I think you call it female ejaculation <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Fuck you Mike <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Sir <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Officer <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Have you not read signs <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Which signs <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The ones on the beach <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Madam would mind squirting elsewhere <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Why Officer <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Because Donna-Mae gets jealous <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It also stains <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Citric fruits <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Lemons and limes <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">They get these stains out <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">How do you know that <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Because I used to work in a greengrocers<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I think that you might find that although explicit <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">That Monika has not broken any laws <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The beach sign is very clear sir <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">But does it mention mathematicians<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I will have a look <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">No sir there is no mention of mathematicians<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Why do you ask<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Because Monika and I are mathematicians<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It states this on our driving licences <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I am sorry to have bothered you madam <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">That is okay officer as you were only doing your job <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The signs are there for a good reason <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I agree as it would not look good for Cape Cod <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Attractive women squirting all over the beach <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Before I go may I ask you a question <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Please do <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Many years ago I found out that my folks <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Originally came from Grimsby <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Do you know Grimsby <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It is in the United Kingdom <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Our fathers were Grimsby born and bred <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I would recognise the accent anywhere <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Donna-Mae will be so interested when<em> <\/em>I tell her<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Do have a great day folks <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And be sure to say hello to Grimsby for me <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">We will <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Mike I thought we were for the high jump <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">You must be careful when we talk shop <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Monika<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Yes <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">You said that your father came from Grimsby <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">He did <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">What was his name <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Daddy <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">No his proper name <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Reginald Peter Briggs <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Did you live in Jubilee Street <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Near the railway station <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">How did you know that <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Because my father was named <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Reginald Peter Briggs <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I do not remember you <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Same here <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Silly question but did you lose any of your brothers <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Funny you say that we lost little Mikey on a trip to Cleethorpes<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I was waiting for you in the arcade <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">But you had vanished off of the face of the earth <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">We thought that some nonce had eaten you<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It was all okay as mum had the twins <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Two for one you see <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Monica where did we meet <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Oxford you silly boy <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Did I not look familiar to you<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I thought that you looked a bit like Mikey <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">But you came from Nottingham <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Think about it Monika <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I think that we are fugitives <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">My name is not Monika <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I just wanted to sound more exotic <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">What was you real name <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Gladys my real name is Gladys <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Mike show me your new tattoo No Y Because the sun is too strong Give me a clue It is mathematical I have shaped my pubic bush Really do show It is here hidden under my bikini pants Do show It is a work of art dear heart I have a question Why if you [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-26845","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26845","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=26845"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26845\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":26854,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26845\/revisions\/26854"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=26845"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=26845"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=26845"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}