Terry Super – Humorous
\n<\/b><\/p>\n
committed suicide
\nin front of an ICE train<\/p>\n
he always knew that he would die of the cold <\/i><\/p>\n
he married a co-joined twin
\nand had an affair with her sister<\/p>\n
for this crime he was committed to prison island
\nwhere he had a butterfly tattooed onto his chest<\/p>\n
within days it had flown away
\nso he replaced it with a lion<\/p>\n
lions do not fly away <\/i><\/p>\n
he celebrated his birthday
\non the longest day
\neach year<\/p>\n
although he was born in February <\/i><\/p>\n
he shared his birthday
\nwith his brother Swansea
\n<\/i>although he only had sisters<\/p>\n
whom he loved very much\u00a0 <\/i><\/p>\n
his sisters did not reciprocate his love
\nand stole all his clothes<\/p>\n
he wore the same suit for twenty three years<\/i><\/p>\n
until the day he committed suicide
\nwhen he purchased a new one<\/p>\n
this suit remains at the cleaners <\/i><\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
The Strict Life of Father Mike <\/b><\/p>\n
His church was only half built
\nso he offered only short sermons<\/p>\n
He would not baptise anybody
\nover four feet tall
\nand his summer fairs would only last twenty minutes<\/p>\n
But all was fine in the parish of Father Mike<\/p>\n
For he had stolen the church spire
\nand was holding it captive
\nuntil it confessed its sins<\/p>\n
An odd attraction to a nearby yew<\/i><\/p>\n
A tree that Father Mike secretly loved<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Geraldine Daulaphine <\/b><\/p>\n
liked her name
\nand was drawn
\nto its many vowels<\/p>\n
she was not however a fan
\nof alliteration
\nas she considered it baroque<\/p>\n
aged twenty she moved
\ninto a dictionary
\nand stayed there until she was forty three<\/p>\n
she now lives in new york
\nbetween two volumes
\nof classical biography<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Terry Super – Humorous committed suicide in front of an ICE train he always knew that he would die of the cold he married a co-joined twin and had an affair with her sister for this crime he was committed to prison island where he had a butterfly tattooed onto his chest within days it […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/31"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=31"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/31\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=31"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=31"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=31"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}