One day when I was very young <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I spent a week thinking about God <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I hardly ate and did not wash <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I wore only filthy rags<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Many close to me thought I was going mad again <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Joe knows that I am not mad <\/p>\n\n\n\n
It is just that I see things very clearly<\/p>\n\n\n\n
You stare into the abyss <\/p>\n\n\n\n
In certain ways yes <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I was reading a novel that suggested that God <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Had grown tired of the corruption of his children<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And had decided to punish the guilty ones <\/p>\n\n\n\n
When AIDS swamped the world who suffered the most <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Homosexuals Junkies Blacks and the general White Trash<\/p>\n\n\n\n
This list as you can see is far from complete <\/p>\n\n\n\n
These are just the headliners<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Even when the infection was at its height people just carried on <\/p>\n\n\n\n
It was like walking along a railroad track between trains <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Although I was not totally convinced at first<\/p>\n\n\n\n
This idea had a good deal of mileage <\/p>\n\n\n\n
People who had strayed from God and were being punished <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I try to be a good person and avoid temptation <\/p>\n\n\n\n
But I fail<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It is not because I am a sinner <\/p>\n\n\n\n
We all are<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It is because I misunderstood mathematics <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Mathematics can be used to model and solve problems in science engineering technology economics and in everyday life <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Everyday life <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I thought you would spot that <\/p>\n\n\n\n
What is everyday life <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Is it catching a bus to the shops<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Or dusting all of Joe’s many books <\/p>\n\n\n\n
AI suggests the following <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Everyday life is a concrete idea made up of tangible experiences<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Though the concept of everyday life is an abstract idea<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I cannot say that I fully agree with that <\/p>\n\n\n\n
As God is not an abstract <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Far from it <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Like many I feel God everyday <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I do not question God <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I question everything but God <\/p>\n\n\n\n
During my mad days <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I thought that I would be locked up <\/p>\n\n\n\n
In a house full of mad people like myself<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But knew that I was miles away<\/p>\n\n\n\n
From any kind of madness<\/p>\n\n\n\n
As I noted before <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Joe knew exactly what I was going through <\/p>\n\n\n\n
He was always there to look after me <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Forgive me for prying but did you not repeat this savage journey <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Yes two or three years ago in France and Italy<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Did Joe have to come and fetch you<\/p>\n\n\n\n
That is correct <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Was it about God <\/p>\n\n\n\n
In certain ways yes <\/p>\n\n\n\n
But it was more about me <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I had become close to God <\/p>\n\n\n\n
But in the process had lost myself <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I become wanton and excessive<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Sometimes in very ugly ways<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But the important people loved me <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Including God <\/p>\n\n\n\n
God is obviously not a person <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Important yes <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I was loved yes <\/p>\n\n\n\n
But God is not a person <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Did God withdraw you from your madness <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I was never mad <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Far from it <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I was just travelling without a rudder<\/p>\n\n\n\n
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
One day when I was very young I spent a week thinking about God I hardly ate and did not wash I wore only filthy rags Many close to me thought I was going mad again Joe knows that I am not mad It is just that I see things very clearly You stare into […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-35964","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/35964","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=35964"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/35964\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":35968,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/35964\/revisions\/35968"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=35964"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=35964"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=35964"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}