I like to read philosophy books when I am in the bath<\/p>\n
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The works well when I am quite alone<\/p>\n
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But it does prove difficult when my wife joins me in the bath<\/p>\n
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As instead of of studying my books<\/p>\n
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I just stare at her magnificent breasts<\/p>\n
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She sympathises with my dilemma<\/p>\n
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And often lends me her cosmetic mask<\/p>\n
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But this creates a further problem<\/p>\n
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As I cannot see what I am reading<\/p>\n
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It does wonders for my skin and I must say I look a good ten years younger<\/p>\n
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But it does inhibit the furtherance of my philosophical knowledge<\/p>\n
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I have now abstained from taking baths<\/p>\n
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In the hope that the vacancy will improve me<\/p>\n
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But this has failed for two reasons<\/p>\n
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As now I am beginning to stink and socially this has turned me into something of a leper<\/p>\n
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But more importantly I have discovered that if I do not bathe<\/p>\n
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That I will not be able to read my many books of philosophy<\/p>\n
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Life can be so simple yet so complex at the same time<\/p>\n
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You know this is true when you smile into the mirror<\/p>\n
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And it refuses to show any emotion in return<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I like to read philosophy books when I am in the bath The works well when I am quite alone But it does prove difficult when my wife joins me in the bath As instead of of studying my books I just stare at her magnificent breasts She sympathises with my dilemma And often lends […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5198"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5198"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5198\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5198"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5198"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5198"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}