On the day of my fathers wedding<\/p>\n
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He was nowhere to be found<\/p>\n
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I searched all the hired rooms in the hotel without success<\/p>\n
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Until a bellboy noted that he was still asleep in his bed<\/p>\n
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And was complaining that he had been unable to sleep<\/p>\n
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Because the bellboys had kept him awake<\/p>\n
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My mother was waiting for me when I entered the main reception hall<\/p>\n
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She told me that she was having problems with the wedding singer<\/p>\n
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Who was not sure what she should wear<\/p>\n
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I spoke to the girl who had more than a passing resemblance<\/p>\n
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To an American actress that I could not name<\/p>\n
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And told her that she would look good in anything from sackcloth to Chanel<\/p>\n
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But she insisted on visiting the carpet shop next door to look for clothes<\/p>\n
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My mother and I accompanied her and after various selections<\/p>\n
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She emerged from the fitting room wearing only a pair of Oxford Bags<\/p>\n
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We both complemented her on her choice and I gave her a set of plastic vampire teeth<\/p>\n
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As she was on her way to the newsagents to pick up Joan Jett\u2019s guitar<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
On the day of my fathers wedding He was nowhere to be found I searched all the hired rooms in the hotel without success Until a bellboy noted that he was still asleep in his bed And was complaining that he had been unable to sleep Because the bellboys had kept him awake My mother […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5583"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5583"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5583\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5583"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5583"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5583"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}