Cold canoes in a frozen harbour<\/p>\n
If I say that I am a cunt then it will save you reading my poems<\/p>\n
I would ring him but he is dead<\/p>\n
I love Jesus more than life itself but he does not answer my calls<\/p>\n
Any cunt can write poetry but it takes a genius to write bad poetry<\/p>\n
I seduced the most attractive girl in my class and later found my name tattooed on her arse<\/p>\n
I always think about democracy when I am taking a shit<\/p>\n
I only write poems when I have fuck all else to do<\/p>\n
My female admirers often send me knots of their pubic hair – I am weaving these into a piebald rug<\/p>\n
If the world has no natural leaders then why do we settle for the unnatural ones<\/p>\n
I once tried writing a book but put it down after six pages<\/p>\n
I have never exhibited my paintings as I do not paint<\/p>\n
I am a racist a homophobe and many other things but my dog still loves me<\/p>\n
There are beautiful and ugly women in this world – somebody somewhere has a sense of humour – that is why I believe in God<\/p>\n
I prefer winter beaches to summer beaches<\/p>\n
All women are bisexual but nobody has got around to telling them<\/p>\n
Cats are not blue and do not have a clue about their own mortality<\/p>\n
Crabs are wonderful creatures as they do not judge me<\/p>\n
Cunt is a word that I enjoy using as it rhymes with my second name<\/p>\n
Women masturbate frequently but what do angels do in their spare time<\/p>\n
I like feeding swans in the autumn<\/p>\n
Food is necessary but tedious<\/p>\n
Unlike you I feel what is not there which is terrifying<\/p>\n
Chile is a country that I would like to visit as I was not born there<\/p>\n
Karma is a misunderstood word and is used by people who do not understand its meaning<\/p>\n
Oranges are the most aggressive of fruits but are often the most beautiful<\/p>\n
Freedom is an illusion none of us are free<\/p>\n
Fred Hunt<\/p>\n
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Cold canoes in a frozen harbour If I say that I am a cunt then it will save you reading my poems I would ring him but he is dead I love Jesus more than life itself but he does not answer my calls Any cunt can write poetry but it takes a genius to […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6309"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6309"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6309\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6309"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6309"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stuartmillerosborne.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6309"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}