Stuart Miller-Osborne

I have populated my glass cabinets With lead soldiers They are very small Less than an inch in height Their weapons are fearsome But they present no threat

Another night Another dream I was in charge Of sending Empty stock Back to the depot It was an exhausting task As there are no depots In my dreams Which was regrettable As sunflowers Were my only luxury

We have been in space for a considerable time It was only meant to be a short mission But that did not work out We are due to return in a few days What an adventure it has been I asked God for a Ginny dream Which I thoroughly enjoyed My colleague sadly did not […]

What have you written in your notebook Joe When it rains the leaves tremble Why Because I am a poet

Sometimes my poetry Disappears from my pen I mourn its passing And then it returns

Joe I am so mad I was driving down to see your mother When I was held up by unannounced roadworks It caused a gridlock When I enquired why The first Cambridge graduate hardly spoke any English His dusky partner had the intelligence of a slug The third Cambridge graduate told me that these were […]

On the day of the feast Giovanni visits Annabella In her room and after talking with her He stabs her as they kiss Giovanni then enters the feast wielding a dagger On which his sister’s heart is skewered He tells everyone of their incestuous affair His father dies immediately from the shock Joe cannot stand […]

Sham May I call you Sham Lee Green Everybody else does In your Memoirs of a Paperboy You say that you once saw Plain Jane Sane Quite naked That is true It is not another of your wet dreams No Far from it Tell me about Plane Jane Spain She was a bitch An absolute […]

Mr Coker Please call me East Yeast In your Memoirs of a Paperboy You say that you once saw Your Geography teacher Quite naked in her lounge Whilst delivering papers Is that true as it sounds far fetched Or the Wet Dreams Of a Sad Bastard It is very true as I was in the […]

I went on a naturist holiday With Burnt Norton It was her first time What did she think of it To be truthful she was a little shy As she thinks she is fat Is she fat Far from it Did she relax after a while Yes as everybody else was naked Nobody really gives […]