Stuart Miller-Osborne

I want you to wear a loose white shirt on the beach And red sandals And dark glasses The rest is up to you Wear bikini pants or cut downs Or even faded jeans There will be no nudity in my movie So apart from the white shirt The red sandals and the dark glasses […]

I used to work with a Romanian girl Who was rather religious And whilst quite liberal in her views She disliked homosexuals And told me of a Romanian saying Do you want a dick up your arseor your soul in heaven I rather liked this As I consider that male homosexuality Is a sin and […]

Yorkshire Lane Dry Stone Wall Broken Gate Rests

I had a bad dream Noa said to me But bad dreams Are just dreams I replied They will always end Then what is reality Ariel Is reality just a dream

Hi Joe Hi Pete Much doing Not really Have you seen any good films recently No Mabel and I watched something called the ABC Murders on the BBC Agatha Christie Right in one Did you like it Not really Why I found it too hysterical And it did not stick to the book Try some […]

I have been running for a number of months now Many people think that I am quite beautiful I am a flash of colour even on the darkest of days But nobody has written a poem about me So I have decided to write one myself Here is my humble effort Lumo

I was walking through a city yesterday When I was approached by a Marxist He shoved his malignant newspaper in my face Last week I would have broken his young jaw But I smiled sweetly at him and said I am Jewish And for a moment we had a placid understanding Joe the Jew

I read recently that Aurora Has hidden copies of her book The Gods We Can Touch In both Oslo and London I have a good idea where one might be In a few weeks I will be travelling north It will be a long journey in bitter weather To accompany me I recently purchased a […]

I am wandering through the lavender fields It is the height of summer perhaps July I am wearing a long dress white cotton And a sensible straw hat tinged with red I am a character in my late mothers final dream

People are pointing at us Bert As if they have never seen a policeman On the streets before We are in a squad car Tom I will explain that to you later Thanks my friend It is so rewarding To be a Bobby on the Beat