Stuart Miller-Osborne

I must confess that I do not like cross dressing men And because of that I killed a DRAG Queen With my late father’s wartime gun This creature was due to read To a class of innocents at a local school Which was a crime against decency As this pervert had disappeared I was asked…

I can clearly see into my neighbours flat They have curtains but never use them I am intimate with their lives Today the girl opposite fetched an Alka Seltzer As her boyfriend was farting a great deal I watched her in the kitchen Her breasts are bigger and more prominent than mine Although my bum…

We were lying in bed when I farted You suggested an Alka-Seltzer And walked into the kitchen naked To fetch one for me I farted again The girl across the street Watched this drama unfold Undressed and fetched her girlfriend A glass of water and two Alka-Seltzer tablets Even though her girlfriend was in Nicaragua…

I purchased a book By Machado de Assis Whilst visiting my dead uncle earlier today There was a bus ticket (possibly Greek) Between the damp pages When I informed my myopic cat of this find It showed a total disinterest

The actress Stella Green was standing in exactly the same spot To the left of where the night cashier took his last breath Garage 24 She was very happy as she had secured the lead in an important movie I liked her red print dress but the flamboyant patterns annoyed me

About a month ago the night cashier was shot dead at Garage 24 Nobody Cared When the news reached his village nobody cared as nobody could remember him On Tuesday a junkie was found dead at a squat in Campbell Road The cops soon linked him to the garage killing and went to the morgue…

During the rotation of the last few nights There have been strange lights Over the city as yet unexplained When I know you are asleep I watch them from our window The lights are red green yellow and blue Deep down I fear an alien invasion So I soon climb back into bed with you…

Pray for me Yes I’m in love The girl with black eyes French No Italian No Spanish No Negro No Look at me I hate love

Prier pour moi Oui Je suis amoureux La fille aux yeux noirs Français Non Italienne Non Espagnole Non Nègre Non Regardez-moi Je déteste l’amour

Yes I’m in love The girl with black eyes French No Italian No Spanish No Negro No Look at me I hate love