Stuart Miller-Osborne

On the 29th of February 2016 I swallowed a bullet whilst flying between Paris and Prague I had smuggled the bullet on board in a can of talcum powder without being detected When I returned from the toilet I became unwell and lost consciousness   Later I found myself on the wing of the aircraft […]

I was leaning against the washbasin chatting to my sister Who was taking a bath She was humming and occasionally singing ditties from advertisements on TV I found her recreation a little irritating but did not say anything as the world was due to end at ten to five My sister normally took baths in […]

I was leaning against the washbasin chatting to my sister who was taking a bath She was humming and occasionally singing ditties from advertisements on television I found her recreation a little irritating but did not say anything as the world was due to end at ten to five My sister normally took baths in […]

It was quite well known in the village that I kept a bearded dragon in the Valencia Barn During the colder months it would hibernate in the deep seas of straw that I had prepared This was unusual as bearded dragons tended to migrate to warmer countries as the months withdrew I had named the […]

I saw the incident as I was cleaning up after the video gamers had left I was the third cleaner But divorced from the others as I was on the far side of the auditorium The virus destroyed the first cleaner by the fire door And the second one as he walked down the steps […]

Four Greek Poets watched Three Marlborough Girls Return their trays to the kitchen of the coffee shop Where two of the staff were preparing my first meal of the day

I am in bed with my beautiful wife But neither of us is asleep As we are sharing a coffee Which we hope will wake us up   It is sunny outside and still quite warm But the temperatures are slowly fading In a matter of weeks the cooler winds will arrive Accompanied by the […]

I have been unwell recently But I am slowly recovering During my confinement I was met by a torrent of love It was so deep that I almost drowned

I am sitting on a lonely bench at Carnforth station This was where Brief Encounter was filmed some years ago I can still see Alec and Laura in the shadows near the buffet But they cannot see me as I exist elsewhere I am listening to music on my headphones It is relaxing me but […]

In a partially flooded field I saw a derelict piano Next to a bonfire not yet consumed It was quite alone and had quietly accepted its inevitable fate The winter mosaics had already attacked its wretched keys And the rains journeyed without passion through its barren church You were once the shelter of a great […]