Stuart Miller-Osborne

lephants do not fly Elephants do not swim very well Elephants do not like elevated railways – Elephants do not speak or understand German In Italian Tuffi means water dive It is not a name that should be given to an elephant Even an elephant that has fallen from a suspended train into a river…

There is a castle far away that is haunted by the blue dreams of my aunt She died by her own hand on the last day of the war As she had forgotten peace

You should always cook with the pale blue shell of the Koobra Bird And smother your exposed skin generously with the dust collected In minutes you will develop feathers and the ability to fly The options of migration thereafter are limitless

He was a Gatsby like character who was handsome and remote at the same time But he was well liked by those who attended his Tangerine parties He actually called them his Mandarin parties as his late mother was French But accepted that Hamptons folk were more used to the harsher English word They said…

Life on Venus It has been reported that there might be life on Venus I have know this for many years   Journey to Nowhere We decided not to go to Reculver today As the sea shelter where had taken lunch Was so bright and beautiful   Sooty If I had not changed our plans…

Green lobsters do not exist Yet I have enjoyed My summer walks with them But now as it is getting cooler I will be walking on my own Which is a little sad But completely understandable

You were wearing my favourite dress again But I know that I will not see it for a while As you will be leaving me quite soon        

My boyfriend is fucking my sister On the short path that leads to the beach God is aware of this sin And sends me a daily update When we get together for prayers Of late I have become friendly With an ice cream vendor named Molly Which is nice as I have a dairy intolerance…

My father was once a paratrooper and as the eldest I was expected to follow him But I was scared of heights and the thought of jumping out of a plane filled me with dread So when the war came along I stayed at home making needles and hatpins and the coloured paperclips that we…

The trees had been full leaf for a number of weeks But May is fickle month full of promise yet casually cruel I was well aware of her capricious moods and warned my friends As I always do when I see the summer reflected in the clouds