Stuart Miller-Osborne

Daddy why are they taking all our cows off to be slaughtered Because there has been an outbreak of Foot & Mouth in the area But most of our cows are healthy and very fit I know son but some are infected and we cannot take that chance What shall we do We will have…

A group of friends Camped on a railway line Near my rural home This is not a city park You will not be safe As you are in a dangerous place But they cared more for the butterflies The inevitable happened As an express train hit the tent And their hearts were shredded Into the…

One survives and the other does not That is my answer to the exam question Tortoiawa is a misspelling of tortoise Tortoises cannot escape their shells As it is attached to their rib cage and spine Tortoises are ectothermic Seashells are not ectothermic It is not uncommon to find seashells In souvenir shops in coastal…

Guys  Many years ago just after I had left university I found myself at the French Institute in Leicester Square where I caught a movie and it was there that I met a French girl named Pascale It was a strange meeting as I would have walked straight past her (as you do in London) but…

At the bottom of our large garden Near the orchard and the railway track There is a blue green swimming pool Which we frequently use in the summer It is a pretty standard rectangular pool With a diving board and a small summer house I often sit there on gentle summer evenings And watch the…

Guys I have never been commissioned to write a poem as I would refuse – I occasionally write poems for weddings and the like but obviously I do not expect reward as this is a pleasant occupation However about a year ago a dear friend of mine asked me to write a poem about her affair…

From our love room I can see the cathedral I often lie on my back After Rodger has gone Just looking at its towers I am the Dean’s daughter My father has no idea Of how I spend my time Or who I am fucking Near the window there is a watercolour Honfleur historie et…

I am afraid to write my ninth poem So I stop at eight and start again This has worked for me and I have written Poems in batches of eight for a number of years But I do feel that one day whilst intoxicated That I might lose count and not notice my error

Joe Hi Mike long time no see Are you good Very good Mary and I have just made it to one year Wow Josie Josie is just Josie I would not want her to change Is she still fucking Rachel Yep it is a great pash Are you jealous Whatever for Because Because we are…

I was born and raised in North Yorkshire My father was a farmer and he farmed an area Known as No Ordinary Opera which was essentially a small moor When I was nine years old we moved to Australia And I remained there until I was thirty When I was informed that the place of…